Laters, Baby: A Love Deferred
by MissDevon
Summary: AU: Years after walking away from Fifty due to outside interference, Ana is questioning her reasons and trying to figure out who she is and what she wants, while Christian is searching for his something more. Is it time for the lovers to have what they wanted, or will the saddest words really be: "It might have been?"
1. Prolouge

**Disclaimer:** characters contained within are not mine. I just borrowed them to take them out to play. They belong to the respected authors of The Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy; Annihilate Me/Unleash Me series, and The Rescue Me Saga.

**AN:** I always thought that Kate was written as an incomplete character that was often up to something and had ulterior motives for the things she did. I also felt that with her background, it didn't make sense that Ana didn't have doubts other than why Christian wanted to be with her. In many ways, I find that all the characters are better fleshed out in the fanfiction about them than the actual books. With that in mind I started wondering "what if" and then the thought of Kate being a catalyst of a breakup came to be (because, let's face it she was introduced as someone who liked a good lay as much as Elliot did) and what would happen if it took a while for Ana to realize that Christian wasn't the controlling force in her life.  
I also wanted their story to include other influences in the worlds they lived in and brought in characters from other series to play that part out. There had to be a reason why after years Ana suddenly would come to the realization that the life she was living was far from the life she had wanted. Through her friendships and her love of the world of books Ana is going to finally find herself at the age of 32- but will it be too little too late? And what about our Fifty? How has he faired without the woman he wanted to give his heart to? Did he now believe what Elena had told him while he was growing up: that love was for fools?

And so, with no further ado, I give you Laters, Baby  
MissDevon

_**Laters, Baby**_

**Prologue**

_Tristian turned abruptly at the bing singling the elevator's return to his Penthouse. "I thought you left," he spit out in a harsh monotone that was his way of masking his inner turmoil. I knew that for a man used to being in control he had already let me see too much of the power I had to destroy him, still I stepped out of the elevator and into the foyer._

"_I… I couldn't," I told him in a strangled, soft voice. I hoped that I could hold onto the courage that my Inner Goddess was trying to instill in me. "I got to the garage and I realized that you were right…" I managed to get out as I followed his retreating form. "I don't need to wait to know you're the one for me.  
Tristian!" I called, unable to keep up with him, but desperate to get him to listen to me now that I had realized the truth of just how was controlling me and, more importantly, what I really wanted. "I. LOVE. You!" I cry out, watching as he stops short as my words roll over him and he goes rigid. I fall to my knees behind him, tears flowing down my cheeks and crystalizing in the encroaching twilight. "I don't want to leave you… don't want to wait… I know what I said, but I got downstairs and realized that it wasn't me who was saying those things- not really.  
I can't apologize enough, but I know it was Kayla that got into my ear… my head… she's the one who's controlling…"_

"Earth to Ana. Ana do you copy?" Ana heard the voice of her friend calling her back to the world at large.

Startled, she looked up at her dining companion as she slid into the booth across from her. "Sorry," Ana muttered automatically as she hit save on the laptop she had been frantically typing her thoughts out on.

Eva only laughed at her. "I was only teasing. You could've at least finished the train of thought you were riding on," she teased as she shrugged out of her jacket.

Ana only smiled at her tone as she shut down and then closed the lid of her laptop and put it to the side as Eva automatically ordered lunch for the two of them. Somehow, the fact that Eva took charge while Ana took care of her tasks didn't bother her.  
She took a moment to categorize the reasons why.  
Quickly she understood: Eva was only doing what she, herself, would do if the situation was reversed. They normally ate here together as it was only blocks away from the building that they both lived in and Eva ordered their usual. This was the opposite of her so-called BFF who was constantly changing where they would meet for lunch and ordered for them based not on their tastes but on the latest NYT reviews…

"So. What were you doing? Were you editing for Lisa again?" Eva asked, again forcing Ana out of her mind and into the here and now.

"Actually, I kinda started a novel of my own while I was in Co.," Ana admitted sheepishly.

"Ana that's fantastic!" Eva praised as their drinks were placed in front of them and the blonde raised her glass in a mock toast. "And about damned time too, I might add."

"You really think so?" Ana asked uncomfortably.

Eva raised an eyebrow at that: "You've only been talking about writing something of your own for ages, so yeah- go for it!"

Smiling shyly Ana worried the paper from her straw: "that's not the only change I'm making."

"Oh?"

"I'm thinking of leaving Kavanagh Media," she admitted, causing Eva to all but spit out the drink she had been taking.

"You're what?!" Eva asked once she had managed to catch her breath as she wiped at the liquid on her blouse.

"You heard me," Ana sighed as she glanced around them, wanting to make sure no one was paying attention to them. Even though she worked for a major media entity she hated being the center of attention.

"Then again I say: about damned time!" Eva laughed as she put down her napkin and watched Ana's blue eyes go wide as she opened and closed her mouth before finally managing to squeak out a "what?" Rolling her eyes, Eva decided to ignore the question. "You know I can ask to see if the agency is hiring, and if not, you know full well Gideon would love to have you on staff at Crossfire."

Ana only shook her head, surprised at the offer. She knew that Gideon had often teased her about coming to work for him, but she had thought that that was all it was. Yes, she had a degree in literature and had gained a MA in it in NY a few years after moving here, but she still didn't see herself as anything more than the boss's daughter's pet project because that was all her supervisor ever let her see herself as and Kate further the illusion. Sighing, she started to play with the straw in her glass as she decided to ask her friend for her help- or rather her fiancé's. "Actually, I need you to ask Gideon to look into something for me."

"Really? Why? Ana, what's going on? Are you in some kind of trouble?"

"No… It's just… I'm starting to think that Kate's been playing mind games with me for years and I need proof. "

"Why do I think there's more to this than just work?"

"I made a mistake years ago. I think now that it was because of things Kate made me believe- well, not really made me. That makes me sound like I didn't have a mind of my own… I guess she just fed into insecurities I had… anyway, I walked away from the man of my dreams… I told him I wanted to be able to learn to stand on my own two feet; that I thought he'd take over my life… I wish I hadn't now… I mean, I know I still have to learn to do the things I told him I was leaving him to do- and the sad thing is I know I'm going to need help doing it… Kate knows too many things and she knows how to exploit too many of my weaknesses… But, Eva, I want to get him back, or at least try to, and I know to do that I need to have proof of just how much damage she did."

"Then we'll get it," Eva smiled reassuringly. "You'll get back the one who got away."

"No. The one I was stupid enough to push away…"


	2. Chapter 1

**AN**: Just realized that I forgot to put this into the Prologue. I personally hate stories with years in them. Also, because of the interactions I need to change the timeline a bit. Ana and Christian met in 2003/2004. They are currently 32 and 38 respectively. Mia is 31 and Elliot is 41. Taylor is in his mid to late 40ies and Mrs. Jones is slightly older and Elena is the same age as Grace and I'm putting her at about 45 when she started her relationship with Christian. The characters in the other books are the age that they appear in them.

**Chapter 1**

"_What do you want me to say, Ana, when you're ready I might not be waiting?"_

Ana sighed as she pushed away from the table and the laptop she had been working on and rose to her feet, stretching. As she did, she was surprised to realize how tense her muscles were, blinking she shook her head in surprise that dusk was settling over the NY skyline outside of the windows of the Fifth Avenue apartment she was hiding out in. "Thank G-d for true friends," she muttered as she headed for the kitchen to make a cup of tea.

As the water boiled, she thought back over the last few weeks. Once she knew that Gideon was on board she had met Ethan for lunch to let him know that she was leaving KMI… _"I only wish I had the courage to do the same, Ana," he had sighed tiredly, looking so much older than his years in that moment. "My psych degree is all but useless there…"_

"_Your parents…"_

"I_t's not my parents who worry me.  
Never has been.  
I walk and my kid sister is the one who make my life a living hell."_

"_Like she hasn't already?" Ana had been unable to press him._

_Ethan had laughed tiredly at that: "I'd say that I pick my battles, but I've been to tired to fight them for years…"_

The whistling of the kettle brought Ana back to the present. With practiced ease, she started to make her cup of Twinning's English Tea. She wanted to tick off the things that she'd accomplished since the plan to leave NY had been put into motion, but her mind kept bringing her back to the day where she started to question every decision she had made in the last ten years…

_Ana sat on the couch in the suite as she drank her tea and watched the women of what Karla Montague called the "Sub Club" wondering (1) why had had let on to her date's older brother that she recognized Karla's necklace for what really was and represented and (2) if this group would take away the connotation of the phrase 'sub club' held in her mind due to her knowledge of the version of one Christian's ex-submissives had formed and invited her to join…. _

_At the sound of the suddenly raised voice of Karla's best friend, Cassie, her thoughts crashing into the present and the room._

_As Cassie's words and tone crashed over her, Ana found herself on her feet and the only one who wasn't frozen by what was being said. Suddenly, she was unleashing long hidden, if floating to the surface feelings, at the unsuspecting- if not undeserving- younger woman. "What the hell is with supposedly best friends who think they know their college roommates turned bestie better then they know themselves or their hearts?  
Newsflash, Chica, she chose to marry him and have a family with him. To have a life with him, probably over your stringent objections.  
Karla decided how far their power exchange would go and…"_

"_You don't know what the hell you're talking about," Cassie spit out._

_Ana laughed hollowly: "of course I do. Hell, in many ways I was Karla, only I didn't believe in the love I had with someone enough to hold onto it. I let my BFF in my ear and head and let her convince me I was letting a man control me and plan my life. So I walked away from the only man that I ever loved and let her control me instead.  
So yeah, I know what I'm talking about and I'm not letting you do that in even a small amount to her!"_

_Cassie swallowed pass a lump that was forming in her throat: "am I really…" she directed to her friend._

"_Yeah," Karla sighed. "Sometimes it really feels like the reason you say as much as you do isn't that you care about me but that you don't think that I have enough of a mind of my own to know what I want."_

"_Karla…"_

"_I started falling in love with Adam when I was 16 and he saved me in that bus station and you need to learn to accept that…"_

Finishing her tea, Ana walked back to the table and her writing. She knew she had to reread what she had written, but it was almost too hard for her to do so. Unlike what she had been writing previously, this section was based in truth and not fantasy. This was where her heroine told the hero that she was leaving him and listed off the reasons why, at 22, she wasn't ready to be with him. Where she'd walk away from Tristan, only to make it as far as the garage and car he had waiting to bring her back to her apartment and Kayla's sway before she had her epiphany and ran back to him, begging him to accept not only her apology, but her love as well. And it was from that faithful change that all of her own could've and should've beens would be played out across another novel…

A knock on the penthouse door caused Ana to put off the editing of the section, happily. She wasn't ready to face her past in fiction. "Why didn't you use your key?" Ana asked her friend, Jennifer Kent, when she stepped aside to let her enter the apartment.

"After living with Lisa for so long I know better than to barge in on the writing process. If you hadn't answered on the fifth knock, then I would've barged in," Jen laughed.

"It's not barging when it's your place," Ana countered as she closed the door.

Jen only shrugged as she put her purse down on an end table. "I have to say that I'm surprised you answered so fast."

"Was taking a tea break," Ana admitted as she headed to the sitting area where Jen was getting comfortable. "You alone?"

"Security's downstairs," Jen admitted with a roll of her eyes.

"Ahhh… Tank's off," Ana said well aware of the Wenn Security machine when it came to Jen and Lisa.

"No, Tank is with Alex on their way to negotiations in Seattle of all places," Jen sighed as she dug her Iphone out of her purse.

"Seattle?"

"Yeah. We figured since we're against this guy in a bidding war for a shipping firm in Taiwan but have similar plans it would be beneficial for both of our bottom lines if we consolidated and go into this together."

"We or _you_?" Ana wondered as she tried to remind herself that although the most prominent, Christian wasn't the only business man in Seattle.

"Well you know," Jen shrugged self-consciously.

"Which is exactly why I asked, because knowing you two it could be either."

"Fine it was my idea," Jen admitted, earning a laugh from Ana. "What? I have to earn my astronomical salary somehow."

"And you're here and not en route with Alex why?"

Jen inhaled and started to fidget: "I'd tell you I just wanted a 'girls night' but you wouldn't buy it any more than Lisa.  
So, truth," she admitted a bit shakily as tears formed in her eyes, "we've gotten some threats- ones that have been deemed serious. Alex wanted to keep me out of harm's way, so he insisted I stay here and I only relented when he took Tank instead of leaving him here to guard me," she admitted as she punched one of the throw pillows in frustration. "I swear to G-d, Ana, I don't know what that man is thinking. He knows it almost killed me those weeks I thought he was dead after we were ambushed!"

"That he'd rather you be alive than live without you?"

"You sound like Blackwell," Jen grumbled as a knock sounded on the door.

"High praise," Ana laughed as she went to answer the door. "I'm going to guess that this is Lisa since security didn't call up. I swear I don't know why you guys don't just use your keys!"

"We're not the ones currently living here," Jen chided slightly. "Besides, she has her own detail," she remarked as she went to make martinis for the group. "Oh, Eva's…."

"Here," the woman in question chimed in. "I caught Lisa on the way in," she explained as she and the pettier blonde strolled in. "Luckily, because security here is pretty tight from what I hear."

"Oh?" Ana wondered as she closed the door. "Cary not coming?"

"He has a date- prefer not to know the details," Eva explained as she shrugged out of her light weight jacket. "And as for the 'oh,' Kate's been squawking," she added dismissively.

"Sorry," Ana sighed uncomfortably.

"For what? Your former bestie being a b!tch?" Lisa wondered.

"For unleashing her onto you guys."

"Oh puh-lease, she's been on my case since the day we met," Eva laughed. "And I've dealt with worse."

"That's comforting," Ana sighed as she and the two blondes sat at the bar and she and Eva started sipping a martini while Lisa started to make a second pitcher.

Shaking her head, Eva decided to try to veer the conversation into a different direction: "Gideon hasn't been able to find out much about the person paying those bills you wanted him to look into. "

"Really?" Ana asked , not really sure if she should be surprised or not. She knew that there was only one other possibility for who was paying the bills at the long term care facility. "What did he find out?"

"That the person is near the West Coast and must be worth at least as much as he is- or very good at covering his tracks- if not both."

Ana nodded at that: "Ok, then I know who it is. Tell Gideon I said thanks and that he can stop digging," she replied before popping an olive into her mouth, trying to ignore the fact that the other women were sharing a worried look.

"Well, we've got your cover story in place. If and when Kate realizes you're not here she'll think you're ensconced in Stark Int."

"Of course it will take her time to realize that you're doing PR and advertising got Nikki Stark and not Damien," Jen added, having worked with Alex and Gideon to get a plan of action that was believable into place.

"She goes by Fairchild, not Stark," Ana corrected automatically.

"But Damien would put up her new media person in one of his properties to make her happy," Jen pointed out as she poured herself another martini.

"Also, it's not like Kate's going to figure out you're really living in some barely there on the map town in Co." Lisa jumped in . "And it's not like she cares enough about your love life to draw connections based on three dates in NY plus an engagement party in Aspen to your new friends."

Ana rolled her eyes: "I'm going to work on dinner. You guys want to pick the movies?" she groused as she moved into the kitchen, effectively shutting down the conversation.

"Oh-kay, what did I say?" Lisa wondered one she was sure that Ana was out of earshot.

"I'd guess that the one time Kate was interested in Ana's love life for something then the connections it could get her is the time she ruined it," Jen remarked thoughtfully.

Eva sighed: "you think we're ever going to find out who the one who she let get away was?"

"If I thought it would help I'd have Blackwell try to find out who he is, but for all we know he's moved on. Besides, it's not like we have a whole lot for her to go on," Jen sighed.

"Like that would stop her?" Lisa asked. "Besides, if he's anything like our guys he hasn't…not really," she finished as she poured herself another martini.

"So what do we have to go on? He lives somewhere on the West Coast- or thereabouts. He is probably rich and/or involved somehow with security," Eva remarked as she crossed the room to the entertainment center where she started to look through the DVDs, quickly discarding the Zombie movies.

"Where was Ana from again?" Jen asked as she took her glass and the nearly empty pitcher with her to the sitting area.

"I know she went to undergrad in Washington. I think she might have worked in Seattle before moving here and taking the job at KMI," Lisa told them.

"Seattle?" Jen asked. "Well, that could explain her reaction… no…"

"What?"

"She seemed interested when I mentioned that Alex had a meeting out there."

"Seattle, rich, powerful…" Eva muttered as she looked back at them. "Can only think of one person who that might have fit ten years ago," she mused as she held up two DVDs for the other two women to choose from.

"And if it's who I think it is he's single," Jen said as she pointed to her choice as the same time Lisa wondered: "are you guys gonna fill me in?" at the same time Ana called out from the kitchen: "If you guys are done speculating on my life could one of you help me?" causing Eva and Jen to share a knowing look and shot on at Lisa who rolled her eyes as she headed to the kitchen.

"So how do we prove our theory?" the blonde wondered.

"You have met Barbra, right?" Jen laughed. "I wasn't kidding when I said I was thinking of asking her to look into things," she admitted as she heard Lisa and Ana's voices coming towards them. "I'll talk to her about it when I get into the office tomorrow," she asserted as Ana and Lisa approached with the prepared meals: "so what did you guys decide on?" she wondered then smiled when Eva held up one of her favorite classics. "Nice," she smiled as she placed the plates she carried on the coffee table and Lisa did the same and they continued their discussion of the edits needed on Lisa's latest book and pages for the movie script based on her first.


	3. Chapter 2

**AN: **thank you for all your reviews; I have taken some comments into consideration. One of those is that I will be reworking the title (I should've realized it would've been already taken) to _**Laters, Baby: A Love Deferred.**_ Also, I will include a character list at some point and I have been putting together a Pinterest board for the story with who I see as the characters, as well as some quotes and music that go with the story (I have placed the link in my profile.)

**Chapter 2**

Christian took a swig from the crystal glass in his hand as he watched Alexander Wenn walk tiredly out of his office, their negotiations for the night complete. Normally he wouldn't have invited the man- or anyone outside of his family for that matter- into his inner sanctum, but with the threats against Alex he had thought it best to negotiate here are Escala. When he had invited the other man into his home office he had done so forgetting the portrait that graced the wall across from his desk. Ten years after he had purchased it from the now sort after Jose Rodriguez, he forgot that it was there- _her _face a reminder of the fact that he could be more than he had ever thought he could. That he could be a family man, and have a 'normal' relationship- if he was so inclined. But, instead of the normally calming effect it had on him, tonight it had brought up feelings he had long ago had to leave behind- he felt a combination of jealousy and ire that the picture had drawn Alex's attention. Perhaps, part of the problem was that he didn't know what had fascinated Wenn so much, after all, it was well known that Alex only had eyes for his fiancé…

"Boss," Taylor called from the door, bringing Christian back to the here and now. "We might have a problem."

Christian sighed as he signaled for Taylor to come into the room as he put his drink down on his desk. "What's going on?"

"Someone's been looking into who's been paying certain medical bills," Taylor informed him tensely after he had closed the door and crossed the office.

"Kavanagh?" Christian wondered aloud as he sat down.

Taylor shook his head: "Gideon Cross."

"Now why the hell would he… are you sure?"

"Welch and Barney confirmed. We're not in negotiations with him so there's really no logical reason…" Taylor continued, letting Christian know that the problem didn't just pop up in the last hour or so.

"He and Wenn?"

"Only connection between the two is the fiancés."

"And it's not either Alex or Cross's style to get personal unless the deal's personal to begin with. Cross is something of an unknown to me in that arena. Alex and I don't have bad blood that doesn't have to do with one of us besting the other in a deal, and the only connection I have to Cross or his fiancé are some old dealings with her stepfather. Besides that, from everything I've heard, Kent doesn't need help from a friend's fiancé to get a deal through. Hell, from tonight's negotiations I'd say she's the force behind this collaboration and not Alex," Christian reasoned as he unbuttoned his suit jacket. "Still I don't believe in coincidence."

"It does seem like one…"Taylor reluctantly admitted.

"I still don't like that he's digging into that particular venture…"

"Permission to speak freely?"

"That's what I pay you to do in situations like these, isn't it?"

"Take your negotiations with Wenn to NY. He'll be more focused there since he won't be away from his fiancé. She'll be able to explain her part in this particular deal, and you can do an in person with Cross once this has been settled."

Christian nodded as he tapped his finger against the top of the desk, taking in the way things could play out: "you work out security with his?"

"Just waiting for your ok."

"Then work out the details.  
Have the NY apartment ready. I want to know why Cross is digging into this!"

"On it," Taylor said and quickly left the room.

Tiredly Christian leaned his head back, his eyes catching those in the picture across from him: "and why do I think you're involved in this somehow that I'm not catching onto…" he asked it and then cursed as he got to his feet.  
He was getting too old for this shit, he thought as he headed out of the office and to his room to get changed. He might not have a sub he could call, but he could work off some of his stress in his home gym…


	4. Chapter 3

**Author's note to address some concerns voiced in reviews:** There will be a HEA for Ana and Christian, but there are going to be things to deal with, especially their insecurities. The issues that come up will be played out with input from the other characters, esp the Rescue Me crew (due to Marco's back story and sims. with Christian) Since there are concerns due to the new characters, I will be using them less than I originally had planned, but will still be using them as catalysts of changing directions, misunderstandings (C&A jumping to conclusions about the other), communication, and facing up to things they haven't wanted ( as well as Gideon being protective of Ana, causing at least one of the above because he thinks that Christian should "work for it" in terms of getting her back) but these are all so that they can get to that HEA.  
Also there will be one character that I've created- Samantha "Manni" Grey.  
And yes, ten years is a long time. They have been apart for that long, but I never said that they weren't in communication (the how and why have to do with those payments Gideon is looking into.)

As to when the "break" happened in relation to the trilogy, I will say that the difference occurred at the point of the belt incident. Christian didn't let Ana run out without "aftercare," instead, he "forced" her to stay (by that I mean talked her into staying/wouldn't let her go in the state she was in) during aftercare they talked; he admitted he was wrong for doing the spanking in his mindset and she admitted she forgot to safe word (basically the discussion from after the gallery opening without the five day span in between).

**Reminder: **Story name will be changing to _**Laters, Baby: A Love Deferred.**_

**Chapter 3**

"_Oh. My. G-d! Kayla was right! You are trying to take over my life," I gasped as I pulled my hand away from his and shot to my feet._

"_No, that's not…" he exhaled in frustration. "I just want you to know that you have options.  
You don't have to leave town or…"_

"_Or you? That's what this is really about, right?_

"_I was going to say your job.  
But yes, I'd prefer if you don't leave me either."_

_I shake my head: "did you really buy the publishing house," I asked, watching as a curse passes his lips. "I should've known!"_

"_I was in the process of buying it before I met you. You can ask Renee if you don't believe me."_

"_Then why ask me where I was applying?" I demanded, feeling like the walls were closing in on me at the same time that my world was crumpling beneath my feet._

"_Maybe I didn't want you to work for a failing co.?" he challenged, his only outward sign of any emotion was the way his hands pulled at his hair while one knee jingled up and down._

"_It was my decision to make, Tristian."_

"_That's my point, Baby. They ALL are," he said in a deceptively soft voice as his eyes shot up to meet mine._

_I can only shake my head in disappointment as I wonder why she had to be right as I forced myself to look away from his compelling eyes. "Then why can't you understand that I need to do this. Explore what else life might hold for me?"_

"_I thought you were happy," he exhaled like a petulant child._

"_I was… I am… I just- Tristian, look at my role model. Mom's on husband number four and who knows how long it will actually last!" I tried to explain as I swiped at tears haphazardly and sat back down next to him: "I just… she lost my biological father so young… she never got to be a young woman who stood on her own two feet," I continue as I reach out to him, both physically and emotionally. "Sometimes I think she resents me for that."_

"_Are you saying you think if you don't go you'll end up resenting me and whatever we do and can share?" he asks in disbelief._

"_What I'm saying is I don't know! I do know that I never want to- or for you to be a regret."_

_I watch as he shies away from me both physically and emotionally and shutters fall over his eyes. "The saddest words of tongue or pen…"  
"Are what might have been," I finish automatically._

_He only swallows and gets to his feet. "Either way there will be regrets."_

"_I… I have to do this. Please understand."_

"_I suppose I do," he sighs as he looks anywhere but at me as his hands pull at his hair: "I just need you to understand something as well: as much as I love you, I can't make promises."_

"_What does that mean?"_

"_I honestly don't know what you want me to say.  
This isn't an ultimatum, just me trying to be honest- when you're ready to come back I might not be waiting here for you!"_

"LISA! What the hell!," Ana exclaimed as she came into the open concept living area from the bedrooms to catch the younger blond reading the story that had been saved as a word document and up on the laptop while it hibernated.

"I'm sorry, I was just gonna check my e-mail," Lisa admitted sheepishly.

"And you, what? Just started reading? Damnit, Lisa, you of all people know about reading someone's unfinished work," And complained as she pushed the petite blonde out of the way and made sure that the document was saved and then closed out of the program before powering down.

"But, Ana, it's good. Like fantastically good- and this is from a girl who does zombies and not romance!"

"First of all, you don't 'do zombies.' You right about human emotions- emotions that just happen to belong to Zombies," Ana said shaking her head at her oft repeated refrain, before becoming cross again: "As for this story, all it is, at the moment, is a very rough first draft that I'm not sure I'm going to do anything with," she all but spit out as she stalked into the kitchen to make a cup of coffee, well aware of the fact, internally, that she wouldn't be so upset if it had been any other chapter that her friend had stumbled across.

"But you have to… there's all that emotion… and the voice…" Lisa protested.

"I have a MA in Literature too, Lisa. I know about all of those things! I was en editor- and not just any editor. I was the one who edited your work before you self-published! Before even Jen read it!"

"Why are you so angry, Ana? It's just a story- a well written one, yeah, but…" Lisa prattled on and realization dawned. "Oh my G-d! That wasn't all fantasy. That's about…"

"Drop it! I don't want to talk about some story I may or may not continue," she huffed as she slammed the filled kettle onto the stove.

"Ok. Ok, I'll back off. I really didn't mean…" she apologized as she watched Ana move around the kitchen and took down two mugs for them.

Sighing Ana hung her head, ashamed at her overreaction: "I now you didn't. It's just that after being friends with Kate for so long I forget what it's like to have someone who is on your side and not out for some unknown agenda."

"Why the hell did you stay friends with her so long?" Lisa wondered. "I never understood that."

Placing teabags into them, Ana sighed: "I would've walked away years ago, but I thought that I had to stay. That she was the only reason that I had my job and my apartment. And I honestly still would've walked, even knowing that I wouldn't have gotten a good recommendation because my supervisor just saw as the boss's daughter's pet project but I also let her convince me that she was the one covering Ray's bill when I should've known better," she explained, only letting a few insecurities bled through a thick veil.

"But I thought…" Lisa started as Jennifer came into the room, a bemused expression on her face. "There's been a change of plans. Alex is moving negotiations to NY," she explained.

"Oh?" Ana asked with a Mona Lisa style smile on her face as Lisa squealed with delight: "I thought he and Tank were going to be gone for at least the rest of the week!"

Jen smiled at her: "well, they're not. Apparently, the guy we're negotiating with likes his privacy, so having to negotiate in his home for security reasons isn't making him happy, and since he has some other items he can take care of here, they're coming back to finish negotiating," she shrugged as she shifted her stance: "but that's not the only change in plans. Ana, we're having you fly out today, ok?"

"I… I um… I told Marc and Angie that I wasn't coming till next week and I'm taking over the lease on their place."

"Wenn has apartments in the area that you can use temporarily," Jen reassured.

"Of course it does!" Lisa laughed with a good natured roll of her eyes, as Ana looked at the two women pondering what to do. _Think, Ana, it might not even be him. Do you really want to give Kate more time to track you down and cause trouble? _Exhaling, she shook her head: "All right, let's see what we can do to make this work. I mean, I also need to figure out the driving situation- I haven't driven regularly in almost 10 years, even if I do still have a valid license. I had planned on taking lessons when I got out there…" she admitted while she was trying to convince herself that it wasn't him who would be coming to town. It wasn't like he was the only business man in Seattle that Wenn could be doing business with…

"Call and see what arrangements need to be made on our end," Jenn pushed gently as she pulled out her phone to make a couple of calls.

"OK," Ana replied as she headed to the bedroom she was using, her shoulders dropping slightly as she sat on the bed. Wrapping her arms around her stomach, she reminded herself that once she was in Co. and away from sabotage she'd get in touch with him and apologize. She'd ask him if maybe it wasn't too late. After all, neither of them her exactly waited for the other- but maybe—just maybe, if she was lucky they'd be able to try again.  
If not… well, she'd live with her regrets. It wasn't like she had a choice but to do so, anyway. In the meantime, she'd continue to pen their happily ever after.  
At least with that, she'd have control to do one of the things she had said she wanted to ten years ago: she'd be learning to stand on her own two feet…


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

At the sound of the phone ringing near her head, Kate cursed and rolled out from under the arm of her bed partner. Looking at the sleeping form, she couldn't help but wonder why she always seemed to end up with the poorer brother than the object of her affection _and this one's not even that good of a lay_, she thought as she shrugged into her robe and grabbed for her phone. "You beckoned?" she spit out as she hurried out of her bedroom, well aware of who was on the other end of the phone.

"Now Katherine is that anyway to talk to your _mother?_" the voice on the other end laughed, in what Kate was sure was supposed to be a breathy voice that called people to her.

"Don't you mean gestational host?" Kate shot back, unaffected.

"Now, don't you dare take that tone with me, young lady. Just because you can't manage to use your feminine wiles to land a man I make sure is in your path…"

Kate rolled her eyes as she went to start the coffee maker: "I have landed a very fine specimen in my bed; in fact you called me from his arms. So what the hell do you want?"

"I hear we have a defector…"

"She quit. No loss. I would've kicked her out years ago if it weren't for you."

"Ahhh, but it is a loss. She still has a part to play in this."

"Or maybe your feminine wiles just aren't up to snuff. I mean, who'd want a dried up old woman like you when they could have me- or even her- at their feet?" she laughed.

"He'll be in town on business. I've made an appointment with a stylist for you, for when you 'happen' to run into him."

Kate tossed back her hair: "he can't stand me. Even a new look won't change that! Besides, I like my new accessory."

"I'm sure you do like your new toy, Pet, but this has been the endgame for a long time now and as you haven't been able to procure another of equal standing…"

"Fine, I'll make sure our paths cross. Happy?"

"Not yet, but I have a feeling that I will be eventually," she intoned before disconnecting.

"If you think I'm letting one of your flying monkeys change this perfection, you old witch, you have another thing coming. As it is, listening to you backfired ten years ago. If I had just gone to his office to begin with he never would've fallen for little pure innocent Ana instead of at my feet," Kate muttered and then placed a wicked smile on her face as she heard movement in the bedroom. Shifting she made sure that the robe fell to bare her arms and tease at her chest as she walked back to the room. Christopher Vidal might not be his older half-brother but he had a trust fund and a society mother, for now it would have to be enough. He would just have to be her starter husband….

* * *

Christian ran as if he was trying to outrun the hounds at the gate of hell. However, what he was really running from was the past. As his feet pounded against the moving belt of the treadmill, he couldn't help but replay the moment he knew that Kate had won the game she was playing with Ana's head and his life…

"_Ana, I can explain why I had to leave you here, alone with only Taylor for support," he had started;_ _exasperated that she wouldn't look at him._

"_Kate came while you were gone, Christian," Ana had gently chided him as she continued to place her things carefully into the small open suitcase on the bed in their suite at the Heathman._

"_Ana, you know what I mean…"_

_Ana sighed as she shook her head: "she isn't making me do this, you know."_

"_Ana, please look at me," he had entreated. "I'm sorry…"_

"_You're sorry? Christian, I'm the one who owes you an apology. I took advantage of your kindness and generosity," she had admitted tiredly as tears started to form in her eyes. "I shouldn't have…"_

"_Ana, it's not taking advantage if it's given freely," he had told her as he went to take her into his arms. _

"_Christian, I can't do this. I don't want to keep doing this to you," she had sighed into his chest, and then reluctantly pushed back. "I don't know who I am. I'm not even sure what I want, aside from…"_

"_Aside from what?"_

"_Does it matter?" she sighed and then turned away, rambling so he couldn't press her. "I can't count on you to come and save me, even from myself. I have to learn to… there's no one right now."_

"_You'll always have me, and Taylor," he added trying to add a little bit of levity to the situation._

"_Taylor, yes," she replied with a slight smile as she turned to face him. "He came through with all of this. So did you. If you two hadn't of been here for me…" she shook her head, "but I can't live in denial, Christian, I have to go back to NY and figure out where I go from here."_

"_I wish you wouldn't."_

"_I know," she sighed, and was about to say something when Kate came charging into the room: "we have to go, Steele," she had all but ordered. "I thought you would be done with packing by now!"_

"_I…" Ana had started. "Oh please, I know. Master of the Universe here distracted you."_

"_If I was Master of the Universe, Ms. Kavanagh, you would have been banished to another one by now," Christian had shot back, causing Ana to choke back a laugh: "I have to grab a few things from the bathroom. If you can put the other things from the drawer in the suitcase for me, Kate?"_

"_Sure," Kate had replied with narrowed eyes as Ana had rushed into the bathroom, before she turned with a smirk on her face: "dropped the ball long enough for me to come in and grab it, didn't you Grey?" she had said amused._

"_I had a family emergency of my own to handle."_

"_Timing certainly sucked for you," Kate had retorted as she scooped Ana's remaining items of clothing out of the drawer and tossed them into the suitcase._

"_Next time I'll check to make sure it's scheduled at a time that won't help your plans," he had shot back tensely as Ana returned._

"_Give us a minute, Kate?" she had asked as she frowned down at the clothing lying on top of the suitcase._

"_Why? So he can convince you how you can't live without him?"_

"_I'm going back to NY with you, Kate. Can you please just get over yourself for a minute and…"_

"_You really didn't just go there! Ana, I took time out of my busy schedule to fly out here to be with you in your time of need and…"_

"_And I appreciate it, Kate. Christian knows that he can't change my mind. Now can you go downstairs and wait? I'll only be a few more minutes."_

"_I'll get a cab," Kate said testily._

"_Sawyer's driving us," Ana had corrected distractedly as she tried to fix the damage Kate had caused to her packing._

"_Like I said, I'll hail a cab."_

_Ana rolled her eyes: "then you're paying for it, because I don't have the money to throw around when we have a free ride to the airport because you don't like who our ride's boss happens to be."_

"_He'll just report back what we say…"_

"_He's off duty," Christian cut in. "He's volunteered of his own volition."_

"_Fine then!" Kate said as she threw up her hands. "I'll be downstairs. You better not cause us to miss the flight. Either of you," she continued as she stormed out._

"_You didn't have to lie about Luke," Ana chided Christian once the outer door slammed shut._

"_I didn't. Sawyer said he wouldn't take payment for driving a friend to the airport. Of course, I'm not docking him for the time he'll be gone either," Christian told her._

_Ana only shook her head as she added her toiletries to the suitcase and then shut it and secured the zipper. "I do wish things could be…"_

"_Hey," he had said as he walked over to her and put a finger under her chin, forcing her to meet his eyes. "They are what they are. Whether you're my more or just my friend, I want you in my life, Anastasia Steele. Yes, I would've liked to have had the chance to talk you out of leaving, but I know you know your own mind, even if you don't."_

"_Christian," she had sighed in exasperation as she clasped his wrist in her hand. "I shouldn't have made you think that I might have. My emotions where all over the place since I got that phone call. I took advantage…"_

"_Maybe I'm the one who took advantage, Ana. I have to say I liked having you in my arms again."_

_Ana smiled at him: "I'm the one who begged…"_

"_First," he interrupted with a smirk. "Someday, we'll have our time. You'll see…"_

Exhaling a curse as he mistepped, Christian shook himself out of the memory.  
Years had passed since then.  
Both had been with other people- people who hadn't been the other.  
They talked at least once a month.  
He had tried to meet her when he had been in NY on business trips, but more and more she had started to cancel. He had never learned why, but he had his suspicions…

Stepping off the treadmill, he tried to regain focus as he wiped his face with a towel.  
There had been an almost more once. She was a friend of his sister-in-law, Manny, and he had been with her for almost a year. But, when it came down to it, even with his family's support, she hadn't been what he had really wanted and he had let her go, never explaining why.  
Instead, he had continued to go to major events with Ros as his date when he couldn't get out of it or on his own. He had dated in the public, but never brought another woman home to his family. He was starting to think that he never would.  
Only now, he decided to face the one woman he had ever loved.  
This time he wouldn't let her cancel on him.  
He would see her, even if he had to sit outside the blasted extended care facility and wait for her to visit it.  
A plan in mind, he headed to the showers, hoping that he had worked himself into enough of an exhaustion to sleep. Perhaps, he'd even dream of her when he did….


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Ana sank into the chair on the Wenn jet and glanced around the plane as the stewardess handed her a drink.  
Staring out the portal, she couldn't help but think of Christian's jet, and how the last time she had flown on it had been due to a dire emergency.  
_That_ she didn't want to focus on, at least not right now.

Glancing to her side she saw her laptop and felt like it was mocking her since she couldn't use it at the moment. She yearned to be able to write a happy ending for the event that had turned her life upside down, but she knew it wasn't going to happen. Instead, she grabbed for her travel bag and pulled out a journal. She needed to write at the moment; even if there was no way that she could change the scene running in her head to fit into the book she was writing.  
She remembered it all too well.  
The feelings.  
The emotions.  
His touch….  
All things that she knew she could never really capture justly, but she was driven to try. Putting her drink to the side, she put pen to paper and poured out her memories, rich with emotion…

_I woke myself with a scream. The nightmare was so real! I saw myself standing next to the grave, staring down farther than could be possible at the casket. The wood was gleaming, as if reflecting the light even though fog was swirling around my feet and the sky was over casted and growing darker.  
I had hunkered into my coat, my ears even with my shoulders as the pain of my neck and back rose to consume me physically and not even coming close to the pain in my heart.  
Suddenly, the top of the coffin had turned translucent and I saw him lying there broken, then suddenly he was pounding on the lid, only I was too high up to do anything about it and when I leaned over the grave opening I had started to fall, my scream waking me…  
It had also brought Christian into my room._

_I don't know how I had forgotten that he had been sleeping on the couch in the living room of the suite, not wanting to be further than that away from me, and as he had reminded me, he didn't need that much sleep. Anyway, I was suddenly in his arms, his lips against the crown of my head as he whispered words of reassurance to me._

_I had begged him not to leave me and he had promised he wouldn't.  
Then I begged him to make me forget and he said he couldn't.  
That he didn't want me to regret it later._

_I remember being so hurt and mad.  
I pulled out of his arms and jumped off the bed…  
"Why don't you just say that you don't want me?" I had demanded as tears streamed down my cheeks._

"_Throwing my words back at me isn't an excuse!" I had screamed, feeling him coming up to me._

"_I want you. I could never not want you," he had responded as he pulled me against him; my back to his front. One of his arms crossed my upper torso so that his hand cupped my opposite shoulder and his other hand laid just above my pelvis as that it applied just enough pressure that I could feel how he really did want me. "I just never want you to regret allowing me the pleasure and privilege of making love to you."_

"_I could never regret that. You're the only one who makes me feel this way," I had pleaded as I laid my head on his shoulder so that I could look up at him. "Please, Christian. I need to feel like I belong to someone. That my love isn't poison. That there is a tomorrow worth striving for…"_

"_What if I just held you?"_

"_You can always just hold me, Christian. Tonight, I'm the one who needs more…."_

"Miss Steele," the stewardess 's voice called me back to the plane. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but can I get you another drink? Something to eat?"

"I won't eat till we're in the air," Ana answered distractedly.

"Ma'm we took off over a half hour ago…"

"Oh" Ana had said embarrassedly. "Ummm… another drink, I guess. And something light?"

"Of course. I'll have it out for you in a few minutes," she replied as she headed to the galley towards the back of the plane.

Ana meanwhile, swallowed and started to flesh out the rest of the scene a bit uncomfortably. She wasn't one for writing descriptive sex scenes, but she needed this outlet. Needed to put the images into something concrete so that down the road she would have a way to delineate between reality and the fantasy of the life she was rewriting…


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"I spoke to the girls and they're happy we're heading home. Damien Stark called; Ana's en route to CO. The only think I want to know is why aren't we continuing negotiations here?" Tank asked as he shut the door to the guest room his boss, and friend, was using at Escala.

Alex only looked over to him from where he was packing his briefcase: "you catch the picture hanging in Grey's office?"

"Taken by a college friend of Ana's and the she-devil," Tank advised as he sat on the edge of the bed, then laughed at the look he was given: "what? Surprised that I know who took the photo? Wenn's used him a few times for promotions. He got his start in part due to the six portraits that Grey bought; although they were never included in his portfolio- I reviewed his information when I realized I recognized the technique."

"I was actually amused at your description of Kavanagh. You being able to find out more about that portrait is as much of a surprise as Barbra getting the latest couture outfit for one of our girls," Alex shot back with a smile. "Why didn't a connection to Grey show up when you did the background check on Ana?"

"Had to have been more than five years ago," Tank admitted, and then clarified: "She's not a threat, you know."

"I know… " he sighed, "I just don't like having to deal with unknowns, especially when threats are coming at us from other sides."

"And you think I do?" Tank responded good naturedly while rubbing unconsciously at the area on his chest where he carried the wound of an unhinged man's attempt on his fiancée's life.

"No comment," Alex replied as he turned and sank into one of the chairs arranged around the room. "So what do you think the real reason is he wants to move things to NY?" Tank raised an eyebrow, causing Alex to laugh: "OK, aside from my interest in the picture?"

"Taylor claims that he wants to make the move because it will give him a chance to see the future Mrs. Wenn in action, and that he believes that she knows more about this deal and its inception than you do."

"And you think it's something different?"

"Gideon was looking into who was helping to cover some bills for Ana."

"What bills?"

"Familial- and from what I could find out I think that Ana thought the she-devil was covering them."

Alex exhaled and ran his hand down his face tiredly: "do I even care at this point?"

"Rhetorical?"

"Ya think?" Alex sighed as he pushed to his feet: "you think she was one of his…"

"In the same way that Jen…"

"Don't go there," Alex snapped.

"Just stating a fact. She's not the type to be one of his contract girls. Not that he's had one in years…"

"At least to our knowledge."

"He cut Lincoln loose years ago," Tank pointed out, and then grinned slightly: "Of course that was only supposition."

"There were a lot of rumors about that woman," Alex remarked and put up a hand to forestall his security chief's comment: "and I'd prefer if they stayed that way.  
She was friends with my parents… I don't even want to entertain the thought…'

"If it's true than he could've been…" Tank mused, his voice dropping off in implication.

"Would've preferred not to think of that, but you have a point.  
Check to see if you can find the connection between him and Ana- just to make sure that Elena's not a threat to the girls. Let Angus know…"

"Already have, and Scot will be happy to allow him in as long as there aren't any other appointments."

"Gideon isn't going to let him off easily…"

"You would?"

Alex smirked: "I'll play from the sidelines. I just want a couple of months without a serious threat to our safety."

"Try to relax a bit, Boss and call Jen. You're maudlin."

"I've gotten used to her traveling with me," he admitted. "I never thought I'd have this again… and it's even more, that's why I can't risk losing her."

Tank nodded: "you're worried she's still pissed?"

"She doesn't like it any more than I do…" he shrugged. "I'll call her."

* * *

Ana smiled as Ray slipped into the empty chair across from her: "You look good kid," he said simply.

"I'm getting there," she replied as she put her journal to the side. "I've missed you."

"Feeling's mutual, Annie. I just need some time to get back to where I was."

"You know I love you right?" Ana asked quickly. "That I only want what's best for you?"

"What's brought this on?" Ray asked with a bemused expression.

Ana shrugged: "Sometimes I just don't think I ever told you how important you are too me, or that if I did it wasn't enough."

"I've always known. Besides I thought I was the one who didn't do the whole communication thing well. You're the one who loves to read and write. Speaking of… writing anything interesting?"

"Just a story, Daddy."

Ray smiled at that: "I'm happy to hear that. And I hope you know how proud of you I am," he said as he placed his hand over hers on the table top. "I remember when you were just a little girl, most of the other kids in the neighborhood were out riding their bikes, but you were sitting in the garden reading to your teddy bear or making up stories you were telling it."

"I did that? I mean, I remember the reading the stories to it, but I made them up as well?"

Ray laughed: "honey, you were 5 and just starting to read. You made up stories to go with the pictures, and as you could read more words spun the tales with the handful of words you recognized on the page."

"Oh."

"And then on raining days you used to want to use your mother's big mug. I'd fill it with milk or hot chocolate for you and you'd sit by the window and read to yourself…"

"I still like to sit with a big mug and read at the window, especially when it's raining."

"I'm glad somethings never change, Annie," Ray said simply, then went to say something else as Ana's phone started to ring.

"That's the ringtone for Mom," she quickly explained. "I kinda have to take it. She's been making not so subtle hints about her and the latest boyfriend."

"I'll wait," Ray said easily, then added at Ana's torn look: "I'm not going anywhere…"

Ana jerked as the phone rang again, and quickly moved to answer it, knocking her journal to the floor: "hello?" she asked groggily.

"Ana, honey, its mom. I'm not interrupting something, am in?" Carla asked.

Shaking her head, Ana looked around the cabin of the airplane as sadness descended on her. "No, Mom, I just fell asleep. What's up?" she asked as she pushed herself to her feet and started to walk to the bedroom at the rear of the plane.

"What's this I hear about you quitting Kavanagh and moving out? And why am I only hearing it because I'm standing outside of Kate's building, with my bags, I might add, because I was going to surprise you with a visit and couldn't find you. And why doesn't she know where you are?"

"I quit because I wasn't happy there."

"Ana, it's a good job…"

"I was a flunky. I did what I was told and I wasn't going to move anywhere in the position. Christ! I haven't moved in my position in the 10 years I was there."

"Kate said if you just applied yourself a little more instead of having your head in the clouds…"

"I did, Mom, I really did. My supervisor stole my ideas and…" Ana said as she stood outside of the bedroom and sighed.

"Not this again. Ana, I thought you worked through that with the doctor you were seeing!"

Ana exhaled in a huff, she didn't want or need to go there with her mother. Carla never quite understood what had been going on with Ana. She didn't want to or need to. Social Anxiety, Generalized Anxiety, and Depression where not something she wanted to know about or to admit her daughter had- and even if she did, she didn't think it was something that she should be talking to some stranger about. "I have been, Mom, but it's not something that just goes away."

"You have to start seeing things how they really are not as you perceive them to be."

"Mom, my supervisor using my ideas to further his career is not something that I made up. It is not an irrational idea when you have proof- like the e-mails with the details of the campaigns he passed off as his own," Ana defended, trying to keep her anxiety from rising. "As for the moving out, I wanted to try something new."

"Fine. Where are you? I'd prefer to have this talk with you in person."

"I'm moving out of the city, Mom. I'm… I don't even know how close to where I'm going…"

"Oh for pity's sake, Ana! How irresponsible can you be?"

"Me? Irresponsible? Funny you didn't think I was the irresponsible one when I was a kid taking care of you. When I was the one paying for your divorce from Bob! When I help set you up in an apartment after it."

"That was before, Ana."

"Right. Before… before I got treatment for things that bothered me," Ana sighed. "Look, I still have a week or so on the apartment. You can stay there or…"

"I'll find a hotel. No need for you to put yourself out."

"Fine. I need to go now."

"Of course you do."

Ana rolled her eyes as she ended the call and then slowly opened the door to the bed room. She looked first to the bed and ray's prone form, wishing he could talk to her. Then she slowly took in the machines around him and looked over to the nurse sitting a nearby chair and smiled sadly as the other woman looked over to her: "he's resting comfortably and his vitals are good. There should be no ill effects from the trip."

Ana nodded: "can I sit with him a while?"

"Of course. I'll be over there, should you need anything," she said as she indicated a corner chair that would allow Ana some privacy with her father and still have the nurse there if he should need her.

"Thank you," Ana replied as she took the nurse's seat and then cupped Ray's hand in both of hers. "I wish you could tell me what to do, Daddy. That you were here in more than body, I need you so much…" she whispered, long sense used to a medical staff member's presence when with her father. "Please come back to me, daddy. I need you so much…."


	8. Chapter 7

**AN**: Yes, I will speed up Christian and Ana's meeting. Yes, there will be answers coming as to what happened to Ray and it does come into play in C&A's relationship. Also a reminder: Alex, Jen, Blackwell, Lisa, and Tank are from **Annihilate Me/Unleash Me**, Karla, Adam, Cassie, Angie, Marc(o) , Luke, Damien, Savi, and Mari are from **the Rescue Me Saga,** and Manni, Nula, and Christopher are mine. Ana is writing a story that is a mixture of what happened with Christian and what she wishes she had done differently. She has changed their names- hence Tristian (Christian) and Kayla (Kate) and others to come. Christian and Ana meet in 2003/2004, ages are posted in chapter 2 and I do have a pinterest page for this story (link is on my author page). I think that covers most of the questions I have gotten.  
I thank you for your comments and questions because it does make me think of different things I can try, that being said, just because you think "it's dragging" doesn't mean that I will automatically change things. In this case, it did work for the story because the one or two scenes I had planned could just become references or flashbacks. I try to develop motives and reasons for my characters to be doing things, not have readers guess at them or assume due to cannon, whether author or fanfic created. I need to play that out because this is not just a clear cut story, there are layers to what happened and there our twists that will occur. I like to foreshadow things if possible, without coming right out and say what will later happen when possible. That being said, I hope you enjoy.

**Chapter 8**

It had been a week since Ana had moved to Colorado and she was happy to be getting accustomed to her new home and surroundings. She supposed that she was happy here, but it had been a long time since she had the freedom to do what she wanted and she wasn't sure if what she was feeling was happiness. It was something she'd have to talk over with the therapist that Savi had helped her to find.

In the meantime, she had work: PR for Angie's catering business, Marco's outdoor/adventure business, and even the club. She was also helping Angie put together a cookbook, Karla a poetry book, and editing a paper for publication for Savi. Plus there was the work she was doing for Nikki Fairchild and she was waiting to hear from the school board near her cottage if she'd be hired as a substitute teacher. In all it wasn't too bad. She had money saved from working for Kavanagh and income from the rental of Ray's house. It would be enough to get her by for a while, and she knew that if she wanted it she could also get a job editing for Wenn from the comfort of where ever she called home. But all of that was too much for her to think about at the moment.  
It was little steps - little victories- that she had to concentrate on.  
It was having a car and being able to drive the almost hour to the club and back, although she was going to stay in the living quarters there with Grant this time.  
It was not being afraid to try to be herself with this new group of people and to learn from them.  
It was being able to apologize to and, in turn, accept one from Cassie for what had transpired between them in aspen.  
It was being able to handle the logistics of Ray's transfer to a long term care physicality here.  
It was getting on a schedule and sticking to it.

In all it had been a week of small victories, but there was a major challenge she had to tackle at some point in the near future.  
A challenged name Christian Grey…

* * *

Christian hit his head against the seat back, his frustration taking over the cabin of the airplane. "This has been a clusterfuck!" he finally spit out.

Taylor looked at him sidelong as he split his attention from the security report he was reviewing. "OK, Captain Obvious, you want to elaborate?"

"You're not funny, Taylor. Nothing about this whole damned week has been funny!"

"Oh, I don't know. I happen to think that Ms. Kavanagh throwing herself at you qualifies as hilarious." Taylor said dryly as he turned the page of the report.

"If you were in my shoes I don't think you'd be saying the same thing."

"Welch is still tracking the cell phone, and I'm waiting for Ray's doctor to call me back. He was out of town when he was transferred…" Taylor said, deciding it was best to get off the topic of, as he had dubbed her, Troll Bitch Jr.

"Do you think it was just a coincidence?" Christian wondered.

Taylor sighed: "I think something finally made Ms. Steele realize that she needed to kick Kavanagh out of her life. I think that she had help from Cross, and probably Wenn too."

"And their fiancés."

"Yes," Taylor agreed.

"I wish one or both of them would just tell me what I want to know!" Christian said punching the arm of his seat. Then at the look on Taylor's face bit out a "what?"

"Considering how overprotective you have always been of her, isn't it better that they aren't giving you the information easily? That they are protecting her?"

"Not if they think they need to protect her from me," Christian grumbled.

"No offense, Boss, but both of them _know _you. They know your reputation and how you run things. At least one of them saw you with Nula and no one since."

"Can we not go there?"

"We're going to have to sooner or later. Her divorce is final this week_. _That means that Manni and Mia are going to team up to try to get the two of you back together again."

"So not going to happen."

"So you say."

"Meaning?"

"If things don't work out with Ms. Steele, what do you plan to do? I somehow think a vow of celibacy is out of the question."

Christian flipped Taylor the bird as his phone rang and he pulled it to his ear with a terse "what?" a smile flittered across his lips as he looked over at Taylor: "he has a fix on her location. It shouldn't take us too long to reach her from the airport. Welch said it's some sort of club, he's going to send you the details when he pulls its records."

Taylor nodded: "and your plan of action is what?"

"Not let her get away," Christian told him. "She's not going to avoid me this time.  
Ana is going to talk to me and we're going to figure out what the hell we both want, and if it's the same thing, I'm not letting her go again."

"And if it isn't?"

"Something tells me that won't be the case…"

_Cocky bastard. _Taylor thought as he shook his head and turned his attention back to the report he was reviewing. It was going to be a long night…

* * *

Samantha "Manni" Grey smiled as she opened the door of her home and let her best friend and business partner enter. "Well, it's done. The jackass and I are officially divorced," Nula said as she dropped her briefcase by the door.

"And you feel how about that?" Manni wondered.

"How should I feel?" Nula wondered. "It's not like we filed the papers yesterday and got it done today. It's been almost three years."

"So… are you planning to start dating anytime soon?" Manni wondered as they entered the sunken living room.

"Oh hell no! Manni we are _not _going there! I thought you were passed the whole: Finola and Christian need to be together phase!" she shot back as she collapsed onto a couch.

"I just think you two…"

"It was eight years ago!"

"So you're still counting?" Manni smirked.

Throwing a pillow at her, Nula sighed: "we went out eight years ago, broke up seven. I met the jackass a couple of weeks later. Whirlwind occurred, we eloped and I have looked back way too many times since," she listed and then quickly added: "and no. I don't look back at Christian. I look back and I wonder why the hell I married the idiot!"

"He's changed. You've changed…"

"And he's still hooked up on a memory!"

"Oh pish…"

"Pish? Did you really say pish?"

"Grace has us working on our language with Mia's baby coming."

"She's had you guys working on your language since before Christopher was born. Where is my godson by the way?"

Manni shrugged from her seat across form Nula: "he's with Elliot. He wanted to practice baseball and since I'm just a girl and all…"

"Right!" Nula said with a roll of her eyes. "So are we going to sit here and gossip or are we working on the details for Coping Together?"

"And if I say gossip?"

"Topic turns to you…"

"So what have the vendors said?" Manni asked earning a haughty laugh from her best friend…

* * *

Ana frowned as she took in her appearance in the mirror. The all black outfit wasn't exactly something she'd normally wear. The shorts were too short and she had the blouse opened so far down that she felt like she was showing too much cleavage. "You look hot," Karla said as she stood in the doorway of her old bedroom in the living quarters above the 'Masters at Arms BDSM Club.'

"I don't feel it. I feel naked," Ana sighed as she put on mascara.

"You wouldn't wear that on a date?" Karla wondered.

Ana shrugged uncomfortably: "depends on who with and where we were going."

"So the one you 'pushed away?'"

Ana looked back at Karla as she recapped the mascara: "wouldn't let me out of the bedroom, never mind the house, dressed like this."

Karla smiled at that: "that's a Dom for you."

"Karla…"

"Sorry. I know we're not supposed to discuss him."

"I just can't," Ana replied as she adverted her gaze and fiddled with getting the makeup back into the makeup bag.

"Are you sure you don't mind helping out? I mean you were only supposed to watch the twins and Mari and now…"

"Now I'm helping Grant with inventory. How much more trouble can that cost?" she wondered as she met Karla's gaze in the mirror.

Karla smirked: "around here you never know. Oh, and don't forget to wear your collar."

Ana held up the black leather collar embellished with a blank dog tag, a sign to members that she was under the protection of the owners of the club. "Do you think I'm really going to need it? I'm just helping to take inventory and stock the bar."

"You might. Adam said they got a call from some hotshot CEO's security people to set up a meeting for membership. It would be better if he knew that you were off limits. Besides the guys will feel better if you do. You're going to be cutting it close to opening and if someone comes in…"

"Right. Wouldn't want them to think I was on the market," Ana smiled as she handed Karla the collar: "Help me with it?"

"Sure…" Karla said, and then added as she clasped it: "the guys are overprotective. You probably won't even need it. Once you're done you can drive to the house and relieve Marc and Angie. They would've come straight here but Damien and Savi have a scene planned and Luke's dungeon master tonight. I'm not sure if Cassie's coming in. If she does she'll be up here…"

"It's fine Karla. Not like I haven't done stock before," Ana said as she pulled her hair up into a high ponytail. "I still don't think I look hot!" she complained causing Karla to laugh.

* * *

He stood in the shadows watching the club as he stomped out his cigarette. _She _ was in there. His information was solid this time. She was there and he could get her with little trouble. He had kept eyes on her friends. They had considered him a threat not knowing who he was really after.  
He had made mistakes in the past, but this time he would get her and own her…


	9. Chapter 8--- they see each other

**AN: for clarification purposes**: I have said that my initial plan on how much the x-over characters are used is going to be less than originally planned. That being said, I originally had planned for them to be the catalyst for C&A reuniting and still needed them to fulfill their role. In the upcoming chapters they'll be there for support. The story will be going in a different direction due to feedback and will have a couple more AC characters instead of the x-over ones.

No, Christian was not married. Manni is married to Elliot; their son is named Christopher for something that Christian did while she was pregnant with him (his middle name is Carrick).  
I fwd. a week from when Ana left NY for CO. I tried to show that in the first couple of paragraphs of the last chapter. Christian spent a week in NY and was given the run around by Gideon and Alex. They want him to find her on his own as a way to see if he'll fight for her. Neither Gideon nor Alex are involved in the club, Ana met the owners at an engagement party. The owners will be connected to Taylor.  
The backstory will continue to be revealed through Ana's writing of her novel, as well as conversations between her and Christian, and later an important one between her and Elliot and/or Carrick.

I do want to make it clear that I do appreciate all feedback and try to answer questions when they won't entail spoilers. That being said, please try to make it constructive. I do take the time to consider it and how it might enhance the experience of both of us.  
Also, if you PM me, don't be surprise if you get one back. I like to see what you are getting from the story because then I know whether or not I'm clear in what I am trying to express. I strongly believe the only stupid questions are the ones not asked.

Sincerely,  
MissDevon

**Chapter 8**

Taylor fought back irritation as he talked to Welch on the phone while trying to keep up with his boss. Christian Grey, hard nose business man, was worse than his eight year old daughter at a dance competition! "Welch, are you shitting me?" Taylor asked as he stopped in his tracks. "Repeat again what type of club… No way in hell would Ms. Steele be at a… Welch, she wasn't a… Fine, text me the coordinates," he finished tiredly, hoping this wasn't some wild goose chase where the boss's emotions would pay the price (and in turn so would all of they).

Coming to the rented black Audi SUV Taylor frowned as Christian turned towards him after stowing his suitcase in the back. "I'm going to try to get this last report done so I have time to focus on Anastasia when we get to that club."

"If she's there," Taylor muttered as he threw in his own gear.

"Why wouldn't she be?"

Taylor closed his eyes, wanting to block out his boss's bemused expression. _Of course he heard that,_ the blond thought as he slammed the hatchback shut and headed around the driver's side. "Taylor…" Grey started in a warning tone.

"You do know that tone doesn't work on me, right?" Taylor asked as he looked over the hood of the car and at Christian. "You want to intimidate me, get your impression of Gail down."

"Taylor…"

"Fine," Taylor sighed. "The… type… of club that this is doesn't gel with what I know about Ms. Steele."

"I don't understand. Welch said it was a private club. That we were meeting with one or more of the owners to get in and that Ana would be there."

"Boss, it's a… an alternate lifestyle club."

"Why would Ana… and why wouldn't Welch have told me…"

"Boss, really?"

Christian's brow furrowed and Taylor could see realization dawning on his face as his jaw worked up and down: "Already told Welch she wasn't one of your subs and I don't think she'll be there. That being said, whoever has her phone might be able to tell us where she is. I also have Sawyer working on getting information on where Ray was moved. Since I'm the alternate… we'll get answers."

"She better be safe…" Christian said as he yanked opened the front passenger door. "I honestly don't know if I'd prefer for her to be there or not… I want to see her, but the thought of her…" he cursed as he threw his briefcase onto the backseat. "Let's get there and find out what's going on…"

* * *

Kate tapped her foot as she waited for the elevator to her penthouse. She so didn't want to have to deal with life at the moment. She was not supposed to be working at this point- hell she should have never had to to begin with, but her father had insisted that she get her degree. So, good daughter that she was, she got one. Then he had insisted that she not only use it, but to _work_ to get to the point that she needed to in his conglomerate. As if!  
No, she had carefully recruited former professors to make her look good in her daddy's eyes. That these professors were the same ones that she had slept with to pad her GPA and recommendations list didn't hurt. She still led them around by the dick, and now the pay cheek as well.  
The only person she hadn't been able to control completely in the scenario was Ana Steele.

Sweet, perfect, annoyingly innocent Ana Steele had been a thorn in her side for years now. She had become friends with her to keep up appearances. Later it was to keep the hounds at bay. Ana was in many ways too smart for her own good. She read and comprehended things that Kate didn't care to focus on. Instead, Kate made sure that Ana's supervisor feed her information to keep Ana from usurping her one day. Ana was in many ways the daughter that her father wished he had. Oh, he liked that Kate was tenacious, but that was it. He wanted hard working and reserve. He wanted behind the scenes and happy with a pay check and no allowance. He wanted what Kate couldn't and wouldn't be.

Sighing, she got off of the elevator and headed to her door, only to stop short when she saw someone waiting at it. "Mom, what are you doing here?" she asked.

Leslie Kavanagh smiled at her daughter: "I had to come into the city to get something's ready for the upcoming fashion show and thought we could catch up. I was sorry I missed you at the office…"

Kate plastered on a smile: "I had a meeting with Vidal about PR for one of his bands. You know how I live for work…"

Leslie smiled at her daughter indulgently: "I know you wish you didn't have to. That your father was more understanding…"

"Its fine, Mom. I like it," Kate sighed as she unlocked the door and let her mother precede her into the apartment.

"I heard Ana left Kavanagh and moved from your father. You must be lonely without her."

"She needed a change. You know how hard the last few years have been on her," Kate deflected as she put her things down. "Should we order dinner or would you prefer to go out?"

"Here would be fine," Leslie said as she sat and smoothed out her skirt. "I wanted to let you know I heard that _woman_ is in town."

"Mom…"

"I don't like that she told you our dirty laundry and pulled you into the middle of some old revenge scheme."

Kate rolled her eyes: "she didn't. She just shows up on occasion to play mind games. I can handle her."

"If you're sure."

"I am. Now tell me about your plans for the show…"

* * *

He watched the movement of the two women from the window. Although the frosting hid most of the view, he could tell where she was and hungrily drank her in.  
Soon… soon she would be his as she should've been all those years before.

* * *

Taylor sat in the chair in the owner's office with a perplexed look on his face. As Adam picked up the papers Christian had signed he looked over the rim of his glasses at the man who had served with him: "Go ahead and ask, Taylor."

"None of my business, Sarge," Taylor shot back.

"Really, because I find it interesting that you take orders from Doms so well," Adam shot back as he placed the signed NDA on his blotter. "So, Mr. Grey, how did you hear about the club? I'm guessing it's not from Taylor or any of the contacts we have in common."

"Actually, one of my other security personnel suggested we come here," Christian started.

"Oh? And he knew about us how?" Adam asked. "I mean, I've noticed that you didn't fill out an application…"

"Like I told you we're looking for information," Taylor squirmed.

"Place like this there's a lot of information to be found."

"I'm looking for a woman," Christian started.

Adam narrowed his eyes: "we're not that type of establishment."

"No… she's someone I know- loved," Christian corrected. "We tracked her to here…" he started as the door opened.

"Adam…" Ana started, then immediately changed her tone and looked towards the floor as Grant had instructed her to do as the men automatically turned towards the doorway. "Mistress Grant sent me with the inventory for the bar for your approval," she got out in a rush as Christian got shakily to his feet: "Anastasia?" he somehow managed to get out.

In what seemed to him to be slow motion, he watched as she tensed and raised her head. Ana's eyes found his and they widened as she paled slightly in recognition. Her reaction set him off and he couldn't help but bellow, especially as he caught sight of the color encircling her neck: "what the hell have you gotten yourself into?"


	10. Chapter 9--- they talk

**AN:** No Christian wasn't married to Nula. They dated for about a year and she was the only other relationship he had that came close to his with Ana. His reasons for staying with her for so long when he was still in love with Ana were to prove points to his family and Ana about moving on, but in the end he couldn't.  
Also this chapter is not what I had originally planned, but it seemed right.  
Hope you enjoy.

**Chapter 9**

Ana gulped at the look on Christian's face. She wasn't ready to see him. Hell, she didn't want their first meeting in almost five years to be in this club. Yes, they talked on an average of once a month, but that was different from the face to face.  
Unconsciously, her hand went to the collar around her neck, as Adam asked if she was ok. "Umm…" she inhaled as she quickly looked away from Christian, feeling the papers crunch in her hand. "Grant asked me to give you these…"

"So you said," Adam replied with a mixture of amusement and concern. "I take it you know our guest?"

"I…"

"Ana, what is going on?" Christian asked impatiently as he started towards her. "Why are you in a BDSM club? Why the collar?" he demanded as he came to a stop a mere foot in front of her.

"I'm not…" Ana started.

"The collar is a sign of protection. I thought you would recognize it," Adam cut in.

"You were collared? There's someone… I thought you wanted more…" Christian somehow managed to get out around the lump forming in his throat; his hurt and disappointment, not to mention uncertainty clear in his voice.

"I did, I do… there's never been anyone but you," Ana hastily replied as she reached out towards him; her hand dropping as he took a step back.

"But you're wearing some other man's collar?" Christian sighed in something approaching defeat as he ran a tired hand down his face.

"Men… she's wearing the collar of other men," Adam started to interrupt, then at Christian's curse, quickly clarified. "It's a sign that she's under the protection of myself and the other owners of the club. And, no, none of us are her Doms."

Christian closed his eyes and inhaled to try to relieve some of the tension he felt as moved closer to Ana. "Why this club, Ana?" he asked as he put a finger under her chin so that she would have to look up at him.

"I'm just helping out…" she started, refusing to meet his gaze.

"Dressed like that?" he pressed.

She swallowed: "I told Karla you wouldn't have let me out in something like this…"

"Karla?"

"Adam's wife," she explained quickly as she raised her eyes and then her hand to cup his wrist. "I met them and the other owners at an engagement party. I came to some realizations the next morning when we had breakfast, and knew I had to get out of NY and away from Kate's influence. I had some friends help me so that I could get here and Adam, Karla, and the others have been helping me get settled this past week."

"Wenn and Cross where the ones who helped you?" he asked and then at Ana's nod smirked. "I don't know if I should destroy them or thank them."

"Well, since you've more than likely just signed a deal with Wenn…"

"How did you…."

"Jen said that Alex was going to meet with someone in Seattle. I wondered if it was you and was trying to figure out how to find out. But then the time table changed and I came out here," she explained. "I wanted some time to prove I could be on my own before I called you."

Christian closed his eyes and dropped his hand and his head: "so that hasn't changed then?"

"It has…" she exhaled. "I just wanted to make sure you knew it was my mind that had made this decision. I mean, it has always been. I can't blame my poor choices entirely on Kate, but I have to come to terms with them and myself," she explained in a rush as Christian opened his eyes. "It was always you, but I was afraid."

"Of what, Ana?"

"That it was too late… that _I _was too late."

Christian nodded: "we need to talk and should do it in private," he said decisively.

Ana smiled at him: "yeah. You're right," she said as she looked around Christian's shoulder to Adam. "The inventory's done."

"So I gathered," he said good naturedly. "I hate to put a damper on this little reunion, but we do still need your help tonight."

"Oh…" she said with her lips pursed.

"If Taylor here will vouch for Mr. Grey, I don't see any reason why he couldn't help you at the house with your other duties for the night."

"Other duties?" Christian bit out, as he shot the older man a harsh glare.

"Don't jump to conclusions, Grey. I'm babysitting Adam's twins and granddaughter while the others are here tonight," she informed as she smiled over at Taylor: "sorry, I didn't see you there, Taylor."

"You had your eyes on something more important," Taylor told her. "Although, you and I need to have a talk."

"Oh?"

"Did you not tell the new place that I am to have access to information on Ray?"

"I thought I filed the POA… I'll take care of it…"

"It can wait a few days," Taylor smiled then turned to his former Master Sargent: "Granddaughter? Twins? I'm missing something here. Last time I saw you, you were getting letters from some tiny bopper and you didn't have kids."

"The 'tiny bopper' is now my wife. We have twins who are a couple of months old. Tonight will be her first night back here singing since she had them. The 'granddaughter' is the daughter of another owner. Damien and I sort of adopted each other," Adam responded with some amusement. "He can handle helping out? I don't trust just anyone with the kids."

"Grey's good with kids. My daughter, Sophie adores him and his nephew begs for time with him. Besides, I'll help. Give those two time to talk."

Adam nodded: "ok then. If that's all right with you two?"

Ana looked to Christian who sighed: "I'd prefer having you to myself, but if you being with me is all I can get for now, I'll take it."

Ana beamed as she looked to Adam: "you got babysitters," she said. "You want to leave now?"

"Preferably. I don't relish the thought of you in a club like this."

Ana rolled her eyes: "I'm sure you'd be saying something different if I was here with you," she shot back as she put her hand in her pocket. "I'm parked in back. What about you?"

"You can come with us…"

"I need my car…"

"One of us will drive it back for you tonight," Adam told her.

"You're not helping," Ana sighed. "Fine, but I still need my bags.  
I have a change of clothes and things for the kids. Oh, I also have the manuscripts to go over with the girls tomorrow."

"You're editing again?" Christian asked.

"Yeah," she smiled. "I'm finally figuring out what it is I want in life," she blushed as she looked down and fingered her keys: "I'm going to run to my car and grabbed it. Meet you there?"

"Yeah. But put my jacket on. I don't like the idea of you running around outside dressed in that…" he said eyeing her up and down with a devilish glint in his eyes that she knew meant what he was seeing was supposed to be for his eyes only.

"Won't the jacket make it worse since it will be alluding even more to the fact that I have just this on?"

"But the jacket is mine, Anastasia," he responded as she turned and let him help her slip into it. "I've missed you," he said into her ear as he pulled her close to him. "Go on. Get your things so we can go. We'll pull around back."

"I'll be waiting…" she smiled as he leaned in and nipped her ear.

"You better be because I've waited long enough for you."

* * *

He stood in the shadows near the dumpster waiting, a cigarette hanging from his hand as he watched and waited. He wanted her and he wanted her now.  
It had been too long since he had been in her presence.

As if on cue, the back door opened and she sprinted out, but his hopes were burst.  
She had a man's jacket wrapped around her.

Anger sored up in him at the realization.  
He had always thought she was waiting for him- that she would be waiting when he got out of that horrible place he had been consigned to by his arch enemy- her ex.  
But it seemed as though he had been wrong.

She wasn't some innocent lead astray by a man with a big wallet.  
She was a whore like the others.  
And for tricking him, she would pay.

* * *

Ana raced across the parking lot towards her jeep, a smile on her face.  
She wasn't sure why she had been afraid, but she knew now, it was an irrational thought. False Evidence Appearing Real in all its inconsistencies.  
She knew she'd have to explain its place in her life and her diagnoses to Christian, but with how long he had been seeing Flynn, he of all people should understand.  
But in many ways it didn't matter right now. They would have time to discuss things.  
Maybe they'd even get their happy ending this time around, she mused as she hit the button on her key fob to unlock the trunk so she could grab her bags.

As she did, she felt a chill run down her spine.  
She tried to convince herself it was nothing.  
A shadow.  
An echo.

But as a hand reached around her and pulled her into a body she knew it wasn't.

She fought against the hold as her attacker pulled back her head so she could see him.  
Her eyes widen in a combination of fear and recognition just before he smirked and slammed her head into the frame of her car.

She lost consciousness just as headlights illuminated them and he reared her head back for a second time.  
From somewhere she heard a scream that wasn't hers.  
She heard slamming doors and she felt her body crash onto the pavement.  
A shout as she felt something hit her chest.  
Then there were footsteps and shouts before nothing…


	11. Chapter 10

**AN**: ok, the story is now officially on detour from the initial plans. Hope you still enjoy it.  
Also to answer the question of Nula "making a play for Christian," at this point I have to say no. I, personally, prefer to write strong, independent (if flawed) female characters. I would prefer that she accepts that she and Christian weren't meant to be. That being said, it doesn't mean that Manni, and Mia, see things the same way. Grace is going to be more impartial, and Elliot thinks he knows something about Ana's intentions. Carrick knows more than the rest because he was involved in the aftermath of what happened to Ray and further involvement will either be shown in this chapter or an upcoming one.  
MissDevon

**Music cues: **This chapter brought to you by: _Say Something, Angels Cry, and Heaven Help My Heart._

**Chapter 10**

Christian smirked as he and Taylor headed towards their rental: "I can't quite wrap my mind over the last fifteen minutes," he said earning a slightly amused look from his security chief.

"You can't? I, personally, would like to know what you did with the real Christian Grey!" Taylor shot back.

"What do you mean?"

"You let Ms. Steele _explain_ what was going on and only jumped to, what for you, amounted to minor conclusions," he said as he hit the button to unlock the door.

"Honestly, anyone else and I would've been out of there. But Ana is different. Even if I didn't believe what she had had to say I felt that I deserved to know what it was since it was so contradictory to what she had said she wanted and needed in the past," Christian explained as a pickup truck pulled into the driveway of the parking lot and headed to the rear of the building: "Let's get going I don't want Ana waiting on us alone."

"And there he is, back, with us," Taylor muttered as they got in the car and he started it…

* * *

Karla was heading towards her husband's office when her best friend came running into the building screaming for Adam hysterically. Worried, she hurried after her as Adam came out of his office; he breathed a slight sigh of relief as he caught sight of his wife hurrying after Cassie. To his surprise, the Latina all but threw herself at him: "he was attacking her Adam!" she cried. "We scared him off, and Luke was going after him, but… oh, god she was on the ground… Luke told me to come in and, but what if I should've stayed?... she has to be hurt bad… she wasn't even calling for help… we have to help her!" Cassie continued to ramble as Adam carefully cupped her shoulders with his hands as Karla came up to them.

"Who?" he asked.

"Staci… the guy was beating her… he hit her head on the frame of her car then dropped her and we didn't see what else, but when Luke called out to him he ran and I came in here…" Cassie rambled as Adam closed his eyes at the thought.

"Why is she outside?" Karla asked as she came to a stop next to her friend and Grant started towards them from the bar.

Adam opened his eyes: "An old friend of hers showed up. He was vouched for by a guy who served with me and Marc's brother. They were going to get their car from the front parking lot and…"

"It's wasn't him. The car was still there." Cassie said. "There were a couple of guys near a car out front when we pulled in. I mentioned it to Luke and he didn't recognize them… what if they find her out there and…"

"Karla, you and Cassie go upstairs and wait there. Call Marc and get him to come help and have Angie stay with the kids. Then call Damien and tell him we need help and are closing the club tonight. Stay up there until we know more," he ordered. Karla nodded ascent and then grabbed Cassie's hands and headed back to the living quarters.

"Grant, you grab a med kit and come outside. You're going to have to help me keep had friend in check."

"Wouldn't I be of more help if I went after the attacker?" the dark haired woman wondered.

"The guy who served under me, Taylor, was a medic like Marc. He'll have it covered," Adam said as they headed in synchronized step towards the door. "His boss, Grey, is going to take this like one of us would one of the girls getting hurt."

"Great, like you guys are a freakn' walk in the park to babysit," she muttered.

"You and Taylor can exchange grievances later. Get the damn kit. Luke is after the assailant," he said as he hurried out of the door and heard Grey's anguished pleas to Ana to wake up…

* * *

Taylor started to frown as they moved into the parking lot at the rear of the BDSM club, Masters at Arms. There was a pickup truck parked catty corner to the back door and a jeep. The doors of the pick-up truck were opened and the lights focused on the jeep, whose hatchback was open. "Shit!" he muttered under his breath as he braked and grabbed for his door, "Stay in the car!" he ordered Christian.

"The hell I will," Christian shot back as he too jumped out of the SUV.  
Instinctively both men headed towards the jeep, but it was Christian who found Ana's crumpled body and fell to his knees, gathering her up into his arms.  
Swallowing back fear, he pushed back her hair, to find blood on her hair line as Taylor dropped down next to him and started to try to apply first aid while Christian held her since he refused to let her go.

It was then that things got chaotic.  
Adam coming out and somehow managing to get Christian to let Taylor work on Ana.  
Grant bringing out the med kit.  
Another truck pulling up and breaking fast as two men, one a former Navy Corpsmen, jumped out and a blonde woman stayed in the truck.  
The questions.  
The equipment appearing in ways that Taylor wasn't sure he wanted to know about.  
Another man coming back dragging someone Taylor recognized all too well.

It was then that all hell broke loose, because when Christian saw that the assailant was Jack Hyde there was no holding him back…


	12. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Carrick Grey carefully pulled the vibrating cell phone out of his pocket and glanced at the name flashing across the display. He frowned in recognition, and carefully excused himself from the table under the glare of his annoyed wife. _Well what the hell did she expect after the third ignore?_ he wondered as he skirted the ball room and, as inconspicuously as possible, put the phone to his ear. "Taylor, this has better be good. Grace it _not _happy with me right now as we're at a charity event. Frankly, I'm fine with the excuse to get away from the table and the over blown ego of the keynote speaker who happens to be droning on.  
I'm also assuming this is not about my son, as you only called me."

"Christian's involved in a roundabout way, Sir," Taylor started.

"What the hell does that mean?" Carrick bit out earning a glare from one of the society matrons who was sitting nearby. Returning her glare he continued on his way to the exit. "Is he hurt?"

"Only emotionally, and I will be calling Flynn next."

"Oh, for pity's sake, Taylor! Stop talking in riddles. What did you and my son get yourselves into this time? And is that a siren I hear?" Carrick pushed as he crossed into the lobby.

"We didn't exactly get ourselves into anything," Taylor started. "He finally decided to track down Ms. Steele."

"Track down? Isn't she in NY with that harpy?"

"She left earlier this week. Was staying with friends there for the last few weeks till she could get things set up here in CO."

"So this involves her somehow?" Carrick wondered as he ran his hand through his hair in the same fashion as his younger son did. "What happened?"

"We made contact. Had a plan on how they would talk. She went to her car in the back of the building we were at and we went to the front to get ours…"

"For Fuck's sake, Taylor, this isn't a security briefing! What _happened?_"

"She was attacked in the parking lot. Another car's occupants scared off the attacker, who was Jack Hyde by the way…"

"Hyde's supposed to be in jail. We weren't informed…"

"Well, he was dragged back by the other driver while the driver's girlfriend got help," Taylor explained. "Christian went after him. Took three retired Marines to get him off of him."

"Charges?"

"Only against Hyde.  
No one saw Christian do anything."

"Cost?"

"None. Served with one of the guys," Taylor told him.

"How bad's Ana?"

"Unconscious and she hasn't regained conscious fully. She has been muttering… can't follow much. She has called for Christian. We won't know the extent to her injuries to she has tests done. The only thing we know for sure is that Hyde was send hitting her head against the frame of her car and kicking her in the chest after he dropped her to the ground," Taylor paused, then decided it was best to let Carrick know everything. "Sir, Christian's the one who found her.  
We also need to know who to contact for her medical.  
A friend of hers is a social worker and has her WRAP, but we need the actual paperwork to keep her mother out of this and from making decisions for Ray."

Carrick nodded: "I don't have it on my phone, but call Andrea. She'll be able to get you a copy the fastest. Both you and Christian are listed on Ana's."

"Should I be surprised?" Taylor sighed as the EMTs started to bring the gurney to the ambulance with the retired Naval Corpsman who had identified himself as Marc got in with them. "They're moving her now. One of the guys she's friends with here is going with her because of his training. I'm going to let them know that we're getting her POA. I don't think they'll be room for Christian in the bus, but we'll follow."

"Fine. Let me know what's…" Carrick started as Grace reached him, her annoyance at his behavior clear. "Going on.  
I suppose you'll also need Ray's?"

"Yep. She didn't have time to file it after the move."

"Ask Andrea for it as well," he said as Grace tapped her foot impatiently in front of him. "Keep me informed. I want to know why the hell we didn't find out about Hyde being released," he said causing Grace to blanche. "And if there are any consequences for our side."

"Will do," Taylor said by way of signing off. At the sound of the click on the other end, Carrick disconnected as well and looked at his wife. "Did I hear you right? Hyde was _released?"_

"Apparently.  
He attacked a… a friend of Christian's outside a club in CO. I don't know all the details, but it doesn't sound good," Carrick informed her as he put the phone back in the pocket of his pants.

"This friend have a name?" Grace pressed.

"Yes."

"Cary…"

"It was Ana Steele," he answered categorically.

Grace rolled her eyes: "do I even want to know how he and she hooked up again? How Hyde found her?"

"It would _appear_ to be a coincidence," he said evenly. "She left NY last week. Christian tracked her down to CO. He and she were going to leave together to go talk, and all of this is from what Taylor told me, not our son."

"Does he think that Hyde was following Christian? How much danger is the family in this time?" Grace wondered.

Carrick pulled her into his arms and kissed her head: "do you really think if there was trouble of that sort I would've been the only one at the table to get a call?" he asked pulling away only enough to look down at her and take in her reaction.

"You're right; Sawyer would've probably been called first."

"Probably?" Carrick teased.

"Argument made, counselor."

"Why, thank you, doctor," he sighed. "Taylor said he'd call Flynn, but I think he's going to have his hands full for a while…"

"I'll call him when we're ready to leave," she told her husband. "Which shouldn't be too long now."

"Oh?"

"Mia's getting uncomfortable. Sawyer's getting irritable. Elliot is being… well, Elliot, and I think that Samantha and Finola talked to all their business associates tonight," she commented as she automatically straightened his tie and smoothed out his shirt. "But let's not say anything to them till we know more."

"About which part? Hyde or Ana?" Carrick wondered as they started back to the ballroom.

Grace sighed: "you know perfectly well that I mean both. The children still haven't forgiven her for hurting Christian, and Manni is starting to push for Nula and Christian again."

"Is it just the children?" he wondered.

"Well, not all of us are privy to the privileged information you are," Grace sniped.

"Dear, if you thought about it, you'd realize that you knew plenty of it yourself.  
Christian has asked for your help when it came to someone close to her…"

Grace stopped short: "Carrick Grey, what… something happened to her father didn't it? I hear you mention his name…"

"Ah huh…"

"When?"

"Around Hyde's last go round."

Grace closed her eyes: "so that's where Christian was and where he went off to afterwards.  
I suppose that changes something… but I don't understand how that girl could walk away after finding out why Christian left for a day or two."

"Because our son never told her," Carrick said as they neared their table.

"She didn't know…"

"Just that it was important to him. No more or less," Carrick shrugged as he looked down at his wife. "Never did fully understand it all myself. I think she needed a reason to stick to her guns."

"And I suppose he needed to stick to his pride," Grace sighed as she smiled as her daughter: "hopefully now they'll get to talk it over. I just still don't understand how he got out without the police notifying interested parties," she finished as they reached their table.

"Last name starts with an L ends with an N if you ask me," he replied as he pulled out his wife's chair, earning a glare.

"I know you have never liked the woman, but she isn't the be all and end all of evil in the world."

"Only as far as you know," he muttered, wishing he hadn't had to keep this one of his son's secrets- yet glad he was trusted with it- as he took his seat, a partial truth on his lips to appease their dinner companions on what had taken him away…


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Taylor hung up the phone and headed to where Christian stood with Adam and a blonde woman he had been introduced to as Savannah and her husband, Damien, and a brunette he hadn't been introduced to. The blonde one was talking calmly to his boss while the dark-haired beauty was eyeing the area._ She was in intelligence_, Taylor thought of as her eyes narrowed when she caught him taking her measure. He fought back a laugh at her reaction as the Hispanic man said something to Adam and then kissed the cheek of the blonde and headed into the building.

"Anything?" Adam asked as he approached causing Savannah to say something to Christian as she carefully grasped his shoulder. "I spoke to Christian's father, and he told me who to get the POA from. He said Christian and I are named as her proxies."

"See, it's the same as the other paperwork I saw," Savannah told Christian gently. "You'll be able to take care of her."

"I left her alone. I let her get hurt," Christian said shrugging the woman's hand off his arm. "He hurt her because of me."

"He hurt her because he could," Adam argued.

"And my sister and sister-in-law? Why'd he kidnap them nine years ago?" he snapped.

"You tell us," Adam shot back.

"He wanted what I had.  
He wanted my life.  
Thought that my parents should've taken him because the bastard was in the same foster home as me when they were waiting for the clearance to take me.  
He almost killed my sister-in-law… we didn't know she was pregnant at the time… she almost lost my nephew. You know what she did, though? She and my brother decided to name him for me because I put up the manpower and money to find her and my sister, like I wouldn't do that?" he laughed harshly. "I lost Ana because it was when her father was first hurt.  
I didn't tell her why I left for over 24 hours.  
Didn't fight her when Kate talked her into leaving that time…" he shook his head: "I always thought our time would come, but the bastard stole it from me again!"

"Ana's still here. You can still have time with her," Adam told him.

"You don't understand…"

"Grey, Karla's my second wife. I buried the first one. She found out she had Cancer while I was serving overseas and didn't let them tell me till it was almost too late- so don't tell me about not understanding!"

"It's not the same…"

"So, when my biological father decided to try to kidnap Mari- when he took me and he tortured me, was that all my fault?" Savi put out in a soothing, if tense, voice.  
Christian's head whipped up and around to her, his mouth opened and closed, but he couldn't get a response out: "If you don't think I should blame myself, then why should you blame yourself for the actions of a man you had no control over?" she pointed out.

"I'm always very strict when it comes to security concerning the ones I love.  
I should have walked her out.  
Not let her come to her car alone.  
Sent Taylor to get the rental and stayed with her…"

"And then that bastard would have attacked you in front of her and possibly her as well," Adam pointed out. "I could just as soon take the blame as well.  
This is _my_ club. I—we—pride ourselves of the safety of its members and a woman under our protection was attacked in the parking lot."

"Because I lead him here!"

Taylor exhaled: "we don't know that, Sir. We don't know why we weren't informed when he made parole or when he got to CO."

"Taylor…"

"Ms. Steele worked for him at SIP. That was before the attack on Mani and Mia. He could've changed his plan of attack when she left. If you remember, Sawyer reported more than once that he didn't like the way that Hyde treated her or spoke to her, but she would attempt to gloss over it."

"I'd forgotten," Christian sighed as he ran a tired hand down his face. "That doesn't make me feel any better, if we hadn't have been together…"

"She could've been another piece of his video collection because she wouldn't have had Sawyer there or Roach watching their interactions closely," Taylor pointed out evenly.

"Whatever the case, playing what ifs isn't going to change the present.  
They've taken Ana to the hospital.  
You two have her power of attorney. We need to get there to make sure that she gets the treatment we need, and so she knows that she has someone there for her, she will won't she?" Savannah cut in.

Christian nodded: "If she still wants me…"

* * *

"You got yourself arrested and you expect _me_ to get you out of it? Are you out of what little is left of that ever hating mind of yours?" she demanded as she leaned back in her office chair, her manicured nails tapping out a cadence on the gleaming desk top.

"You told me she had waited for me," Hyde bit out. "I went to get her back!"

"Actually, I told you she waited for _someone_, you assumed that meant she had waited for you," she paused for dramatic effect: "How you could think that mouse was waiting for you is beyond me. She went crying onto another man's shoulder to get away from your cunning grasp.  
In the meantime, I will not go out on a further limb to try to get you out of some mess you placed yourself in because you couldn't keep your libido and temper in check."

"We had a deal…"

"Oh, but I held up my part of it," she countered. "I got you out on an early release, Hyde.  
I got you within her orbit.  
I arranged for you to be in NY and then CO.  
I did all you asked of me- you didn't keep up your end of the bargain."

"Listen here you b!tch! I covered for you for these last nine years. I never told anyone about the fact that you were the mastermind behind the kidnappings…"

"Another screw up on your part," she chided.

"I will have my revenge… on all of you," Hyde shot back as she disconnected the call, feed up with his demands. After a couple minutes of careful contemplation, she reached across her desk for her diary of contacts for instances like this. Quickly, she scanned through, stopping at a name as a smirk crossed her enhanced lips. "Ahh, yes, this one will do nicely," she said as she picked up her phone and called in an old marker that would put an end to the problem that was Jack Hyde… now she'd only have to come up with a way to rid her own orbit of the insipid Anastasia Steele.


	14. Chapter 13--- nightmares

**AN: **Thank you all for the support and comments. I am working on trying to cut back on the 'others' involvement in this story. That being said, I have to have them for certain reasons, but it will be to a lesser degree than originally planned.

Also, a slight warning- this chapter is written as a dream to show some of what happened over the ten years. Because of this I purposely made it jump from one place and time to the next. It is written sequentially.

**Chapter 13**

"…_.Don't let's ask for the moon, we have the stars."_

In a moment her life had changed.  
Or maybe it was a series of moments… moments that segued to cause other moments over time. All of those individual moments lead her here. Here to a place where she was forced to relive them.  
In a moment she had an imperfect dream in her reach and then it shifted and fog rolled in before the darkness to cause her to slip into a nightmare of her own making.  
A nightmare where she was forced to relive memories of the last ten years…

"_Ana why didn't you ask me to stop?" Christian asked as he warmed calming lotion in his hands and leaned over her prone form on the bed._

"_I did!" she cried. "I begged you to…"_

"_Shit!" he muttered as he closed his eyes at the overwhelming emotions. "Baby, look at me," he entreated as he carefully ghosted his hands down her back._

_Shifting, she looked back at him over her shoulder: "why are you doing this? Why won't you just let me leave?"_

"_Because I can't… I don't know how to… You are my more, Anastasia."_

"_Then why didn't you stop? Why did you hurt me?"_

_Christian exhaled as he locked eyes with her. "I never want to talk about the women I was with in the past- especially not in our bed, but this time, I think an exception has to be made," he admitted as he sat next to her on the bed, his hand carefully caressing her died as he continued: "Baby, you know I was a sub once. I was taught to safe word- that begging wouldn't stop what was happening. Hell, sometimes the safe word didn't!"_

"_So you what? Just ignored my begging?" she asked with a touch of heat._

"_No! I would never… I didn't learn to that it was wrong not to heed a safe word till later. I would _never_ ignore a safe word," he defended emphatically. "But you didn't safe word, Ana."_

"_Are you saying this is my fault? That I deserved for that to happen? That I _wanted _it even after I begged you to stop over and over again?" she questioned in a soft, barely audible voice._

"_I'm sorry.  
I should've known better, Ana.  
I should've known that this wasn't what you really wanted.  
Shouldn't have used the belt- only used my hand.  
I should've stopped but I entered a zone where only your safe word would've penetrated.  
Please, Baby, you said you wouldn't leave me.  
Please give me a chance to make this up to you."_

"_When did I…"_

"_In your sleep."_

"_Was that all I said?"_

"_You also said that you loved me… Ana, please tell me it isn't just in the pass tense…"_

_Ana opened her mouth to answer, but he was gone.  
No longer was she in their bed but behind her desk at work feeling tired and stiff._

_Ana rose from her desk and stretched. It was getting close to the time when she could leave, and in all honesty she would have left already had it not been for Hyde going to NY on a business trip. She had been told originally that she was to go with him, but was glad she wasn't. As much as she wanted a chance to go to NY and network, she had to admit, even if just to herself, that there was something off about her boss._

_Shaking her head, she smoothed down the skirt of her plum dress. It was a dress she didn't normally wear, but she knew that Christian loved her in it. Smiling at the thought of her boyfriend, she headed toward the kitchen to make a cup of tea and grab a yogurt since she had worked through lunch.  
Biting her lip, she knew that Christian wouldn't be happy with her missing lunch, but some things were just unavoidable. She tried to think of ways to not do it again, and started to make a mental list of items she could buy to keep in her desk so she wouldn't.  
As she turned to smack into Hyde's chest and smelled the alcohol coming off him in waves._

_Then things went in hyper speed.  
He was touching her.  
Grabbing at her hair and clothes as she fought him off.  
One minute he was on her and the next she was running out onto the street.  
She crumpled next to the building as soon as she made it out of the building._

_Then Taylor was there.  
Calming her.  
Wanting to go after Hyde…  
"Please don't tell Christian… I need him… he'll do something to Hyde and he'll get in trouble and it will be all my fault."_

"_I'm supposed to make sure you're protected."_

"_But I got away from Hyde!"_

"_What about next time…" he asked, causing her to whimper slightly from her seat in the SUV. "I'll make a deal with you. I won't tell him about the attack if you let me assign a CPO to you. You have him with you at all times. You are never alone with Hyde… understood…"_

_She nodded as he closed the door to the car and she turned to look out the window only to see the door to her apartment with Kate opening. Swallowing back trepidation, Ana bent down to pick up the keys she heard clink to the floor._

"_Ana? Are you ok? What the hell did Grey do to you?" Kate demanded as she pulled Ana into the living room._

"_I'm not in the mood for the Kavanagh inquisition right now, Kate. I have to change and meet Christian."_

"_So don't think so, Ana."_

"_He didn't hurt me," Ana protested._

"_But he will."_

"_Will you please get off your 'he'll hurt you Ana' soapbox? He didn't.  
Hyde did this.  
I got away.  
Taylor brought me here so that I can change before Christian sees me and goes after him."_

"_If he's so wonderful why won't you let him? Huh?"_

"_Because I need him.  
I need him to be with me, not facing some stupid charge because he went after my boss!"_

"_You don't let him, I will," Elliot said from the kitchen's doorway._

"_Elliot, please don't tell him!"_

"_Ana…"_

"_I let Taylor convince me to have a CPO.  
I'm calling out till Monday.  
Please, Elliot, I got away from him. I'll be ok with someone else there. I won't be with him alone. I promise."  
"Are you sure this is what you want?"_

_Ana inhaled to answer, but found herself unsettled and sitting across from Roach at his office at SIP. "Miss Steele, do you understand what I'm asking you?"_

"_I think so, Mr. Roach."_

"_I'll repeat, are you sure that you don't want me to take disciplinary actions against Hyde?"_

"_He'll make me out to look like some gold digger who wants to sue to get more money," she told roach as she twisted her hands in her lap._

"_I don't believe that, Ms. Steele."_

"_But others will. Please, just let me have my CPO with me and transfer me when another opening comes up."_

"_If that's the way you want it," Roach nodded._

"_I…"_

"_You what?" Kate demanded as she sat across from Ana at their kitchen table. "Don't tell me you want to stay here with him!"_

"_Kate, I'm happy. I love Christian."_

"_He's your first, of course you believe that it can't get better, but Ana it will never work!  
He's a billionaire and you're only a recent college graduate who comes from next to nothing.  
You won't fit in his world.  
He isn't Dr. Higgins and you aren't Eliza!  
Grow up!  
The offer at my father's company is excellent for you!"_

"_But it's not what I want! I want to be an editor."_

"_So you'll edit copy," Kate shrugged as Ana's phone started to ring. "Don't answer that!"_

"_I have to," Ana cried as the phone started to vibrate in her hand.  
Somehow, she was in a cubical now.  
Alone with the phone falling from her hand as Jose's voice echoed around her head.  
Car accident.  
Truck t-boned on Ray's side.  
He was in surgery… critical.  
Possible- no probable- traumatic brain injury.  
He could die…  
But her supervisor was laughing at her.  
Telling her how she had to work still.  
That since he was in Seattle and she couldn't get a flight out right away she'd get no special treatment- not even if she was the boss's daughter's pet project._

_Suddenly, the phone was back in her hands.  
She watched as the names in the contact list flashed before her eyes.  
She couldn't call Christian, not with how she had left things with him, but Taylor said he'd always be there when she needed him.  
She called and things happened quickly.  
He arranged everything- the POA so he could make decisions for Ray's care in her stead until she got there.  
A flight on a plane to Seattle owned by one of Christian's associates.  
Hotel room, car, care, support, and even Christian._

_Christian who was looking at her with sympathy as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her close to his chest.  
Who listened with her as the doctor gave the grim prognosis.  
Christian who disappeared for two days and who she wouldn't let explain why because Kate was there…_

_Then the world sped up even faster.  
She was a voyeur to her own life.  
The disappointment that Christian told her he had a date to the Coping Together Ball each year when she would try to get up the courage to ask him to give them another chance.  
The pain of knowing he almost had another something more.  
Working to get her MA and sitting alone at a hospital dinner tray next to Ray's bed when she would've graduated because she didn't want to face that day alone.  
Meeting Eva at Krav Magna and getting to know her and Gideon.  
Meeting Lisa at a local coffeehouse where a writer's group was being run.  
Editing for the blonde and watching her books take off.  
Sitting in the hospital with Lisa, Tank, and Blackwell waiting to hear word on Jen and the younger woman's quiet desperation when she thought Alex had been killed followed by the joy of their return to life as an engaged couple.  
Drinking champagne when Lisa signed her million dollar contract for Wenn publishing.  
Holding her hand when Tank was shot.  
Eva, Gideon, Alex, Jen, Lisa, and Tank being there when she crumbled under the weight of depression and anxiety and helped her up.  
Meeting Marc, Angie, Adam, Karla, Damien, Savannah, Cassie, and Luke at Marc and Angie's engagement party.  
Sitting at her computer and sprinkling the pages with hope as she tried to rewrite her life.  
The move.  
Seeing Christian again…  
Walking into the parking lot…  
Being grabbed from behind…  
Seeing Hyde's face…  
Feeling the pain explode in her head…  
Fear enveloping her as darkness ensued and all she could do was scream…_

Quote Credit: _Now Voyager_


	15. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Carrick sat behind his desk with a glass of Scotch in his hand as he tried to come up with a plan on how to handle the Hyde situation. The fact that the family came back to Bellevue after events like the charity event was working in his favor. Once Elliot and Sawyer came down he would be able to discuss what security measures would have to be put in place; he just hoped that this time the women in his life would not only agree to them, but follow them as well…

* * *

Christian buried his head in his hands as the doctor left the crowded waiting room. Taylor stood by the door with the dark haired woman who had been introduced to them simply as Grant. Adam Montague and his wife sat across from him on a couch, while the older man's pseudo-son, Damien and his wife, Savannah sat to their left and the former Corpsman, Marco, and his fiancé, Angelina, sat to his right. "You ok with understanding the medical terminology?" Marc asked.

Christian sighed as he looked up: "I think my mind shut down on the brain and spinal swelling and possible Traumatic Brain Injury."

"Understandable," Marc replied in lightly accented English. "Staci has a serve concussion. Because of the force of the blow there is slight swelling and a minor skull fracture. The force also probably caused the spinal swelling, if not the kicks she received before Luke and Cassie scared off her attacker."

"Which means, what?" Christian wondered with a touch of anger in his voice: "what does it mean other than they don't know when or if she is going to wake up."

"She'll wake up," Karla said simply from her place on Adam's lap.

"No offense but how do you know?"

She sighed and looked over to Angie who shrugged: "Cassie showed us a new sketch she did," she started earning a groan from her husband. "She had never seen you, but she drew you and Staci together and at a very happy time."

"What?" Christian spit out in a cross between confusion and annoyance.

"You wouldn't be the first person she drew without meeting them," Angie put in. "She drew a picture of Luke's later wife, and a child that nobody knew they were supposed to have had."

Christian shook his head: "whatever you need to believe."

"And what do you believe?" Savannah wondered. "Do you believe in her?"

"I believe that she is one of the most stubborn women I have ever met.  
I believe that we were supposed to be together.  
I believe that she ran away from us because she was afraid of regrets, and now all we have to regret is that time apart.  
I believe a hell of a lot of things about _Ana_, but I don't believe that she'd leave us unfinished."

"You also don't like that we call her Staci," Savanah remarked evenly, trying to keep him focus on Ana, but not on her condition.

"What are you a shrink?"

"LCSW."

"And the difference is?"

"Amount of debt after schooling," she shot back evenly, causing him to smile slightly.

"True. And I have a shrink- on speed dial," he admitted sheepishly. "I'm sure that Taylor already has him en route," Christian added load enough for the man in question to hear.

"He won't be able to fly in till late tomorrow. It was the earliest he could get someone to cover his other patients," Taylor replied.

"Right," Christian sighed as he rose to his feet and started pacing, looking down at his watch: "how much longer till they get her to her room?"

"I'll go find out," Marco said as he went to rise.

"No… don't… I just…" he ran a hand through his hair. "I don't understand any of this!  
Why did she leave NY?  
Why come here? How did she even meet you people?"

"She left NY because she got tired of her former friend, Kate's, games," Angie replied.

"_Former?_" Christian asked harshly. "Are you sure you're talking about the same friend that I used to know. She'd never let Ana out of… whatever the hell their co-dependent excuse for a relationship was!"

"She had other friends who helped her get here," Savanah pointed out.

"Went, his fiancé, Cross and his," Christian nodded as he went back to the seat he had vacated. "But what caused the change?"

"She was probably part way out the door when she met us," Karla started, "but I think what did it was when she heard Cassie and I arguing about Adam."

"You didn't tell me this," Adam put in as he looked at his younger wife in surprise.

"You know how Cassie is about you," Karla shrugged as she turned her attention back to Christian. "It was the day after we met her."

"Which was how?"

"She came to our engagement party with my brother," Marc started, adding quickly: "it was just as friends. My brother wanted someone our mother wouldn't complain about.  
Ana made a comment about Karla's necklace…"

Christian looked over at the other woman's neck and raised an eyebrow at that: "so that's what they're calling that piece of hardware nowadays."

Marc laughed: "Stac said something along the same lines," he said then sobered a bit: "I was concerned how she knew what it was. Asked if it was because of my brother."

"Was it?'

"Nope. My guess is it was because of you."

Christian smiled slightly: "she was always one for research…"

"Marc thought it would be good for her to spend some time with us," Angie put in. "We hit it off, well, except for when she told Cassie off."

"She did?" Adam asked with a raised eyebrow.

"She wanted to know why roommates turned besties wouldn't/couldn't let us think for ourselves," Karla told her husband as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Stac said she wished she had had the wherewithal to withstand the criticism like I did.  
Cassie actually didn't even realize she was doing it. We had it out and things worked out.  
She even apologized to Staci."

"She was Ana then, though," Damien mused.

Savanah nodded: "new start, stronger personality, new name. I can definitely relate to that."

"I'm glad she had people she can count on. I just wish she saw me as one of them," Christian mused.

"From what little she's told us about you- and it never included your name— I think she does," Christian nodded. "How did you two meet?" the blonde wondered, earning a slight laugh from Christian.

Looking down at his folded hands, he smiled: "It became something of a joke between us.  
Kate was- thank god- sick with the flu when she was supposed to interview me for the University's paper. Ana came instead.  
When she was coming into my office she tripped.  
I would say she fell at my feet.  
She would reply that that was the only way she was like other women in my life; I would tell her she was right because she was the only one who did that I bothered to pick up."

The women smiled as the men shared amused looks: "and what did she say?" Angie wondered.

"That she stumbled into my life.  
I would tease her that she meant stumbled into love with me.  
She would tell me that she stumbled into my life and then tumbled head over heels in love with me."

"That's romantic," Karla gushed as a nurse came into the room.

"I guess," he sighed as he looked at the nurse expectantly: "you can go see her now. Two at a time," she informed them.

"You go with Taylor," Adam told him. "We can all see her later- well, when Taylor's outside the room."

Christian nodded as he rose and headed out the door, unaware of the pointed look that Taylor and Adam shared. Once the two men were gone, Adam sent Grant a look causing the woman to roll her eyes and join the group: "Taylor told me he wants to have security set up here for Staci. He wants people that he can trust. Damien, Grant, I suggested the two of you…"

* * *

Carrick turned his glass in his hands as he sat across from Sawyer and waited for his oldest child.  
One look at his son-in-law's face let him know that he had been made aware of the situation in CO. by the Grey security machine. "Sorry," Elliot said as he entered the study. "Took longer to get away from the wife than I thought."

"Shut the door and then take a seat," Carrick ordered as he got up and poured his son a drink.

"OK, what's going on that I'm going to need a scotch?" Elliot asked as he plopped down in a chair across from the desk. "And does it have anything to do with Christian?"

"Why would you think it has to do with your brother?" Carrick asked as he brought his son the glass and then took his seat.

"Umm… let me see. You risked Mom's ire by not only taking a phone call, but leaving the table during the keynote speaker's speech. Then we all left when you came back to the table, even though Mom love's the band."

"If you thought something had happened with you brother why the hell it take you so damn long to come down to my office?"

"Just because I recognized that things weren't on the up and up doesn't mean that Mani did.  
I figured that you wanted to keep this on the down low… so what happened?"

Carrick exhaled as he looked down at the blotter on his desk: "the call was from Taylor. He and Christian were meeting with friends in CO. One was an old female friend of your brother's," he started as he looked up and at Sawyer: "I'm assuming you know who considering you heard from security?"

"Yeah," Sawyer admitted. "And they didn't go behind Taylor. I recognized the change in protocol and called them on it."

Carrick nodded: "She was attacked outside of the club they had met at."

"Who and why?" Elliot wondered.

"Ana Steele and…"

"WTF?" Elliot muttered. "I thought Christian cut ties with her years ago!"

"They have remained friends over the years."

"Why so she could have a chance to fleece his pockets?"

"Elliot, you may be my brother-in-law, but I won't have you talk about a lady like that in my presence, especially one of Ms. Steele's caliber," Sawyer said through gritted teeth.

"She had everyone fooled! Kate told me what those two had planned…"

"Right, because Ms. Kavanagh was a real reliable source. You don't want to know what security called her—on a good day," he cut him off.

"Knock it off both of you," Carrick cut off. "Elliot, believe me, Ana could've had pretty much whatever she wanted from your brother- even after they broke up.  
I can't go into the details because of lawyer/client confidentiality…"

"YOU'RE here attorney?" Elliot demanded. "Does this family not have any sense of loyalty? She crushed him!"

"Carrick, I don't have the confidentiality problem you do," Sawyer said before turning to Elliot and letting him know what he knew: "Your father got involved at Taylor's request- after Ray Steele was almost killed in a car accident."

"Right and when did this supposed accident take place?"

"Count back about seven months from Christopher's birth and I'm sure you can figure it out!"

"Seven months… but that was…"

"Yep."

"So that's where he was!" Elliot said. "Wait, she, what? Walked when he came home to help find his sister?"

"He never told her why he left," Carrick told him. "Kate was there when he got back.  
Look, that whole thing has a part in this."

"Oh hell no!"

"Hyde is the one who attacked Ana.  
We're still trying to find out how he was released without us being informed."

"This is a freakn' nightmare!" Elliot said as he buried his head in his hands. "Did they catch him?"

"Yes.  
A friend of Ana chased him and caught him."

"Hopefully she let _him _teach Hyde a lesson."

"She didn't have a say.  
She's in a coma," Carrick told them. "Your brother lost it and beat Hyde up.  
Taylor, ironically, served with one of the club's owners. They're all saying that they didn't see it happen."

"The Boss isn't going to let him make bail," Sawyer observed, not realizing he was acting less like a family member than an employee at the moment. "I think with the pregnancy that Mia will be more amiable to the protocol we'll be putting in place. Mani's the wild card."

"When the hell isn't she?" Elliot wondered. "And should we be worried about Nula, too?"

"I've already spoke to her," Carrick told them. "Nula, like your mother, will follow the instructions she's given. You two just make sure your wives do the same."

"We'll try," Elliot sighed: "that's all I'm promising."

"Speak for yourself," Sawyer told him. "Mia doesn't agree I'm handcuffing to something and locking her in a room."

"Kinky," Elliot muttered automatically, earning a flip of the bird from his brother-in-law as the younger man stood up.

"I'm going back to Mia, now. Can't say I'm looking forward to this conversation, and I, for one, don't plan on telling her who was attacked," he said as he headed to the door.

Once he was gone, Elliot looked at his father: "Dad?"

"Yes, Elliot?"

"Does he blame us- me?"

"For what?"

"For losing Ana a second time?"

Carrick sighed: "I think Christian is more pragmatic than that, Elliot. If he blames anyone, he blames Kate," he answered. "Just… can you try to tone down your hostility towards Ana?" he wondered. "I mean, its one thing to blame her for hurting your brother, but it's an entirely different thing to blame her for things she hasn't done."

"You don't think she had intentions of taking advantage of him?"

"Elliot, Ana is in many ways still that sweet naive girl your brother first brought home a little over ten years ago."

Elliot nodded: "Kate really played me, didn't she?"

"And you moved on. You have a wife and son you love and are happy with."

"And what does Christian have, Dad?"

"A chance, Elliot. Your brother has a chance."


	16. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Elliot entered the room he shared with his wife at his parents' home. As he turned from shutting the door he was met with a raised eyebrow from his wife who was perched reading on the bed. "Want to tell me what is going on?"

"Why do you think anything is going on?" he wondered as he crossed the room to the bed.

"Really, Elliot?" Mani asked, then at his look rolled her eyes: "OK, you couldn't get out of here fast enough! You went down to your father's office and the door was closed when I went looking for you. Considering he took a phone call and left the table, I'm thinking it was something major."

"Christian went to see an old friend…" Elliot started.

"He has old friends?" Mani asked reflexively.

"Yes, Mani, my brother has old friends. One of who just moved to CO. She…"

"Whoa, he has _female_ friends?"

"WTF? Seriously, Mani, you want to play this game now?! Christian's friend was attacked outside of a club they were meeting at. She is in a freakn' coma!"

Mani inhaled: "I didn't mean… is Christian all right?"

"Define all right," he shot back as he started to pace: "he's fine physically, but he beat up the guy who attacked her…"

"Carrick going to go help him out?"

"He isn't facing charges. The thing is, the guy who attacked his friend," Elliot said as he turned to go and sit back down next to his wife: "was Jack Hyde."

"Weren't we supposed to be told when that asshole got out?" she asked taken aback.

"Yep… we don't know why we weren't."

"Well, she must have been some friend if Hyde went after her!"

"Mani… she worked for Hyde."

"So what? She was one of the girls in the videos?"

"No! He attacked her but she got away," Elliot told her. "And no, Christian didn't know. She was afraid of what he'd do. I only know because I overheard her tell someone else. Taylor made sure she was protected and I took care of Hyde with the help of one of the guys on my crew."

Mani pouted: "so she got protected and I didn't?"

"You didn't tell us he was harassing you any more than she did! Oh, wait, I take that back because she actually followed the security protocol that was laid out for her," he snapped.

"Oh, we are not going there, Elliot!"

"Mani…"

"I helped to save your sister. I did what I was told was the only way to get her back. Excuse me for believing the kidnapper."

"Oh you really helped by getting kidnapped too! Yeah, you really did good work there! Instead of just having to worry about what he would do to Mia we also had to worry about you and how we'd get you back!" he retorted as he ran his hand through his hair, afraid of where this was going, yet knowing it would end where it always did when they came to this subject.

"Oh, puh-lease, that's not what this is about! I thought you forgave me. That you didn't blame me!"

"So did I," he replied tiredly, because on the surface he had. It had taken many sessions with Flynn, but he knew it hadn't been her fault that one of his exes turned stalker. Still a part of him blamed her for what had been the outcome because she couldn't and wouldn't follow simple directions when it came to security. That she would ditch a guard when she thought she had control of everything, and it ended in despair.

"You don't get to act like you weren't at fault too!" she shot back angrily as she jumped to her feet.

"If you had followed the protocol…"

"You could've saved her! Phoebe didn't have to die!"

"Really? How? It was both of you or only her!" he shot back.

"You knew what my answer would've been and you did the opposite!"

He shook his head: "You blame me, even after three years?" he exhaled. "I had a choice. My wife and child or hope that my child had a fighting spirit. And she fought, Mani. For a day, she fought!"

"And I'll never know because I was unable to be part of that!" she shouted through tears: "you got to hold her and comfort her and bury her and when I woke up weeks later all I had was a picture!"

"You have me and Chis!" he yelled back and then shook his head. "Blame me all you want. Just follow the damn protocol this time because I don't want Mia and Sawyer to go through what we did," he said as he headed to the door.

"Where are you going?"

"I need a drink… or twenty," he muttered as he exited the room, leaving Mani to deflate onto the bed.

* * *

Mia watched as Sawyer walked out of the en suite bathroom in only his pajama bottoms and headed to the bed. Once he got in she looked at him and sighed: "You want to tell me what's going on? I can tell something is wrong."

"I wanted to wait a little bit, but… Mia, Taylor was the one who called your dad while we were at the charity event," he started softly.

Mia swallowed: "did something happen to Christian? Is it bad?"

"Christian was with a friend in CO. The friend just moved there. They were at a club and were headed someplace else. She went to get something from her car; Taylor and your brother were bringing theirs around to the back. She was attacked in the interim."

"Who did it?" Mia asked.

"The thing is…"

"Who?"

"Jack Hyde."

Mia exhaled in a rush as her hand went protectively to her baby bump: "did the police get him?" she asked in a small voice.

Sawyer nodded: "a friend of A.. of the woman's went after him and brought him back. He's in custody, but…"

"I'll need to follow a security protocol," she sighed then closed her eyes. "Who was the woman?"

"It doesn't matter."

Opening them she stared at her husband: "yes it does. It matters because of how important she might be to my brother."

"She worked for Hyde. Taylor thinks it wasn't because of your brother from some of the stuff that Hyde was spewing."

"It was Ana, wasn't it?" Mia asked perceptively.

"Yeah…"

Mia nodded: "I knew she and Christian still had to be in touch. No way was he still so hooked on her after all this time if it was just one way," she said as he brushed back her hair and then looked at her husband: "when do you leave?"

"What?"

"You were her CPO and I'm sure that Christian wants her protected so…"

Sawyer shook his head as he leaned over and kissed her softly to quiet her and then slowly moved away: "I'm not going anywhere. They'll get her another CPO."

"You're second in command."

"And you're pregnant."

Mia laughed slightly: "Darling, I love you. That said, I know my brother…"

"Taylor knew the owner of the club from when they were both in the service. The guy owns the club with two other vets. My guess is that they're going with someone he knows. That being said, I might have to go out for a day or two so Taylor can come back to spend time with Sophie. Weekends would be the longest we'd be apart and I'd be on Christian detail."

Mia nodded: "thank you for being honest with me. I just need to know what's going on. I will do what I have to to protect our baby, even follow the stupid rules."

"Mia…" Sawyer started as a door down the hall slammed shut. As heavy footsteps sounded outside the couple shared a look: "I don't want that to be us."

"We'll both do what we have to to make sure it isn't."

"We should have a talk about _that_" he said gesturing to the door.

"Why?" Mia asked. "You'd make the same choice as my brother did; even knowing that it isn't the choice I'd make. Why fight about it?"

"I just…"

"Luke Sawyer, I _know_, ok? We watched what they have gone through… I would be pissed and hurt and a whole lot of other things but I don't know that I would blame you. I know you want this baby too, but I also know that you don't want to lose me. If I was that adamant about the whole thing I'd ask my mother to have to be the one to sign the papers only if there was no other choice, but that wouldn't be fair to anyone."

Sawyer nodded: "we're different, right?"

"Only because we've seen what they have been through. Because we've had this talk…"

"Think we should schedule a session with Flynn?"

"If you do…"

"I'll call him when he gets back," he sighed as a knock sounded on the door. With a knowing look, he went and opened it to find Chris there wiping sleepy eyes. "Hey little man…"

"They were yelling again."

"Come on, buddy. You can stay with your aunt and me tonight. Go cuddle with Mia and I'll go grab your sleep gear," Sawyer said calmly as he let the eight year old into the room.

"I love you," Mia mouthed as Chris tiredly cross the room and climbed into the bid bed in what was all too familiar an occurrence. Sawyer just smiled back before going to get his nephew's things, not sure how he felt. He wanted Mia in his arms, but he knew that Chris needed this. One more night on the floor wouldn't kill him, he reminded himself as he quietly shut the door.


	17. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Christian walked into the hospital room alone, Taylor staying by the door to allow him a few moments with Ana. Sighing, he took the seat next to her bed, trying not to cringe at the sight of the bruising above her eyebrow. "I'm here, Ana, all you need to do is wake up and show me those beautiful blue eyes. We don't need to talk about us or what has happened these past ten years. Not now. We can talk about anything you want or just sit in silence. Just please come back to me, don't leave me again…"

* * *

Kate smiled as she sat with Christopher and his family- well minus his half-brother Gideon. As Ireland prattled on she kept her forced smile in place. Ireland would run her wrong any way you looked at it, but the fact that she reminded her of Mia Grey made all the harder for her to deal with the younger woman. As her purse vibrated for the third time, she made her excuses in reaction to the annoyed looks she received from Mr. Vidal and got up from the table. Once in a nearby vestibule, she took out her phone and looked at the missed call log. As she groaned, a fourth one came through. "What the hell do you want now?" she asked the woman on the other end of the line.

"Now dear, is that anyway to talk to your mother?"

"My mother is Leslie Kavanagh, not _you_. You are nothing more than the devious accident that happened to carry me till my birth."

"I could've done away with you and your life, Pet."

"Don't call me that, Elena. Now what the hell do you want?"

Elena exhaled: "I had an interesting call from a former associate of mine. It seems our dear Anastasia is in the hospital in CO, with a certain billionaire at her bedside."

"And this affects me how? I finally got rid of Ana!"

"You couldn't do what you were supposed to do when Christian was in NY."

Kate rolled her eyes as she inhaled and exhaled slowly: "I told you he wouldn't fall for that!"

"Well, now you can repay him for his poor choice. You _will_ contact Ana's mother and the two of you will go and be with her in her time of need so that Christian can get back to his real life."

"You really think that will happen? If you haven't gotten him back into your clutches prior to Ana's time of need, how the hell do you think you will when he has seen and spoken to her? Not to mention that one of your henchmen put her into the hospital bed!"

Elena sighed: "you never learn do you? All you need to do is do _exactly _what I tell you for once and everything will work out. Now, if for some reason it doesn't we _will_ move onto the next phase of my original plans for them."

"I told you then, and I'll tell you again: that isn't going to happen! I will not link my lot in life to his in such an outlandish way. I will also not lose that much time of my own life now that I'm close to getting something approximating what I want in life!" Kate spit out.

"Well, we can always modify the plan… in fact it might be best to.  
I'll have Dr. Greene contact you with a name of a specialist in NY."

"Elena, I already told you I will not…"

"Oh, but you won't have to. As you tell me often, some things are only a matter of DNA. I wonder if Christian and Ana will feel the same…"

"What the hell are you playing at?"

"When the time is right I will let you know. For now, do as you're told for once, or Vidal will learn what you're really after!"

"Whatever, Elena…" Kate huffed as she hung-up. Nervously, she headed to the ladies room to make sure that she would be composed and picture perfect when she returned to the table.


End file.
